Some people think that the government should provide assistance to all kinds of artists including painters, musicians, poets. However, other people think that is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
The allocation of public fundsallocation of budget from the local authorities has been a public concern. Some people argue thatSome suppose that the financial assistance from the government should be used to support artists, while others claim that it is a waste of money. From my perspective, the former viewidea is more reasonable.
Admittedly, the government funding for artistsgovernmental funding on artists is widely perceived as a waste since the subsidies can hardly bring tangible benefits to the public. Compared with other fundamental priorities, such as education and medical care, government funding for artiststhe government financially supporting artists is not likely to directlyessentially address livelihood issues. Considering the limited state budget, offering financial aid to painters, musicians and poets, without making sufficient investments inputting sufficient investments on other vital areas, may inevitably arouse public dissatisfaction.
However, from my point of view, the financial assistance provided for all kinds of artists is justified. For one thing, the government is supposed to assume responsibility for meetingshoulder the responsibility to satisfy the public's cultural and emotional needspublic mental pursuit. With the improvement of people’s living standards, what the public actually pursuespursue is not only material satisfaction but also an enriched spiritual lifeenriched spiritual life, which means the local authorities should allocate subsidies to artists to ensure the creation of artproduction of fine arts. Once the financial burden on artists is alleviatedfinancial burden on artists can be alleviated, more creative paintings, music and poems can be createddelivered rather than profit-driven worksrather than those profit-driven ones, and audiencesthe audiences can accordingly gain spiritual pleasure. FurthermoreFor another, the government should also spend money on promoting the development of the cultural sectordevelopment of culture industry and gaining recognition around the world. Due to the fact that different artistic expressions form part of the local cultural heritagecomprise the local cultural heritage, the funded artists can collectively contribute to maintaining the richness of the artsthe richness of art industry by dedicating themselves to their workthrough dedicating to artworks and thereby helping the local cultural sector flourishtherefore local culture industry will boom and flourish.
Given the arguments above, although the government does need to balance between different aspects, I suppose artists deserve to be supported financially by the local authorities considering the positive impacts on the individuals and the whole society.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response presents a clear position and develops a persuasive case for public support of artists, while also acknowledging the competing budgetary argument. Its main limitation is that several points remain general and some unnatural collocations reduce precision. The highest priority is to support each side with a more concrete example while choosing more idiomatic academic phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are addressed and the writer's opinion is clear, with the supporting position developed through two relevant reasons.
Add a specific example to each side and explore the opposing view beyond the general claim about essential services.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through a clear introduction, contrasting body paragraphs, and a consistent conclusion.
Break up the longest explanatory sentences and reduce reliance on formulaic signposting to make progression more natural.
Lexical Resource
A broad academic vocabulary conveys the argument, but several collocations such as public mental pursuit and dedicating to artworks sound unnatural.
Prioritise idiomatic combinations such as cultural enrichment, investment in essential services, and devote themselves to producing art.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses varied complex structures with generally good control, despite occasional agreement, article, and preposition errors.
Check agreement and noun phrasing carefully, especially in structures such as what the public pursues and the cultural industry.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that the government should provide assistance to all kinds of artists including painters, musicians, poets. However, other people think that is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.