Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children, while others think childcare centres provide the best care. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
It is a social norm that both parents pursue their career paths outside the homeoutside of the home, and their children are taken care of either by nursery staffteachers at nurseries or by grandparents. While asking grandparents for help is advantageous in some respects, there are compelling reasons why nursery schools provide the best preparation for children.
There are reasons why some parents are in favour of having their children looked afterhaving their children being looked after by grandparents. The first reason to consider is that unlike childcare centres, grandparents do not usually charge a feedemand a payment for their service. ForTo some financially disadvantaged families, this can be the most economical choice. Another significant reason is that with grandparents’ support, the child-to-caregiver ratiochildren-caretaker ratio can be just a fraction of that at a nursery. This means there will be more eyes to monitor every step the child takes, to ensure a safe environmentto assure an environment free of any detriment.
On the other hand, sending children to preschools is a more beneficial way to support more comprehensive developmentsolution for a more comprehensive development. With standardised educational methods, these schools may foster both the physical and intellectual growth of children. Children, for instance, can be exposed to a diversity of opinions and backgrounds, thus developing their social skills by interacting with other childrennegotiating with other kids. In addition to this, healthy and balanced meals for children at these places can be provided according to menus that are tailored to meet the nutritional needsfit the nutrient needs of different ages. Preschool children, as a result, may progress faster than those who are cared for at homethose who are home-schooled, both psychologically and physically.
In conclusion, even though childcare by grandparents may guarantee more attention for the children and help the parents save money, kindergarten is the right place for a greater all-rounded progress of a child. It is recommended that all young children are sent to a proper childcare centre.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay’s strongest feature is its balanced, clearly organised discussion, culminating in an unambiguous preference for childcare centres. The main limitation is occasional imprecision in examples and phrasing, including the shift from grandparental care to home-schooling and several unnatural collocations. The highest-priority improvement is to keep every comparison tightly aligned with the two care options while choosing more idiomatic academic expressions.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are explored with relevant reasons and examples, and the writer maintains a clear preference for formal childcare.
Keep the final comparison focused on grandparental care rather than introducing home-schooling as if it were equivalent.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically organised into focused paragraphs, and its progression and cohesive links are consistently clear.
Strengthen the connection between each example and the precise care arrangement being evaluated.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and appropriately academic, though several collocations are awkward or imprecise.
Use more natural phrases such as 'charge for their help,' 'child-to-carer ratio,' and 'well-rounded development.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a wide variety of sentence forms with strong control and only occasional non-impeding errors.
Correct isolated construction errors such as 'having their children being looked after' to improve grammatical precision.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can take care of their children, while others think childcare centres provide the best care. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.