Some people say that there is no need to give international aid by governments as they already have unemployment and homeless in their own country. How far do you agree or disagree with this viewpoint?

Sample Response

1

It is a big concern for many people that it is not a responsibilitya compulsory responsibility of their government to provide international aid to other countries owing to the fact that they have some obstacles in their home country. In my opinion, I would like to take a middle-ground positionstay in middle ground of this debate.

2

Firstly, one important responsibilityaspect of a government is to invest money in their own country instead of providing aidgiving wealth to other countries. In fact, it is true that when the unemployment rate is high in a country and people inof this country need a better economic structureneed better economic structure, they would not support their governments supplyingsupport that their governments supply aid and money to other poor countries. Naturally, they would expect their own problems to be sorted out first. For instance, if any government invests money in the constructioninvests money for the constructions of many new organisations like factories and health departments in their homeland, there will be greater opportunities for national developmentmore chances of development of country and better opportunities to reduce unemploymenthigh opportunities to control on unemployment.

3

Another important thing for any country’s government is to provide homes and some other facilities to homeless people rather than providing aid to other countrieslending money to other countries because in this way the economy would be better than before in that country. If any government has extra money, it should firstextra money firstly they should focus on essentialcompulsory needs of their own country after that, the remaining money can be providedafter that it can be provided as international aid to other countriesas the international aid to other countries.

4

However, we live in a shared worldsingle globe and when people in some parts of the world are starving, many others have abundantopulent resources. Sharing among nations can ensure a better world. The economic structure of the present world would never allow a country to ensure 100% employment and houses for people to live in. Therethere will always be homeless people and jobless youth even in developed countries. So considering these, a rich nation should always help the poor nations in need. Don’t we help people with our resources and money when we still have a scarcity of these? Similarly, a comparatively rich country should always lend a helping handraise the helping hand to the poor nations. The sharing of wealth will eliminate more pressing problems in poor nations and thus in return they would also help in other ways. For example, rich countries like the USA invest in research facilities in many Asian countries and in return they can have meritorious scientists living and working for them and better business understanding.

5

In conclusion, the government of a country should first meet the needs of its own citizensfulfil the necessity of its own citizens. To a certain extent, they should share their surplus wealth with poor countriesshare their extra wealth to poor countries as the international aid that can be helpful for both countriesboth of the countries.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response is strongest in presenting a clear qualified position and considering both domestic priorities and the case for international aid with relevant support. Its main limitation is uneven development and frequent awkward collocation, with the domestic case becoming repetitive and some claims remaining broad. The highest-priority improvement is to streamline overlapping points, qualify generalizations, and express the central conditions for providing aid in more precise, natural language.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

A clear middle-ground position is maintained, and both sides are relevantly discussed with explanation and examples.

Next step

Develop the conditions governing the final position more precisely and avoid repeating closely related domestic-priority points.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0
Scoring rule

The argument progresses logically and paragraphing is clear, though two early body paragraphs cover substantially overlapping ideas.

Next step

Combine related domestic concerns into one focused paragraph and use the saved space to sharpen the comparison.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.5
Scoring rule

The response shows a broad vocabulary, but recurring unnatural collocations and imprecise choices reduce flexibility and accuracy.

Next step

Use natural policy language for government spending, unemployment reduction, essential needs, and the provision of aid.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.5
Scoring rule

A range of complex structures is evident, but article, agreement, pronoun-reference, punctuation, and sentence-boundary errors recur.

Next step

Edit long conditional and contrastive sentences for complete clauses, consistent references, and accurate punctuation.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Some people say that there is no need to give international aid by governments as they already have unemployment and homeless in their own country. How far do you agree or disagree with this viewpoint?

Your response

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