Some people believe that the problem of illegal drugs can be solved by legalising all drugs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?
Sample Response
Illegal drugs have become a worldwide problem in modern day society. The drug tradeThe trading of drugs is widespread in nearly all countries and the number of people consuming drugs worldwide is high. It has been suggested that simply legalisingsuggested simply to legalise all recreational drugs to solve the problems associated with them. I partially agreeI personally agree partially with this proposal, because I can see many advantages, yet also many disadvantages.
One positive aspect of legalising these drugs would be that the number of crimes committed to obtain themcriminal activities committed to obtain them would decrease. Fewer people would therefore be imprisoned and have a criminal history that prevents them from progressing in life. Additionally, essential police resources would be freed up and devoted to other areas. Finally, high taxes could be imposed on the legalised productsthe legal product, allowing governments to have morebetter resources to improve the infrastructure of their countries.
Although legalising all illegal drugs could result in several positive effects, there are many possible negative effectsnegative effects that could be possible. As a result of the legalisation, I personally believe that it would become acceptable to use drugs and people would no longer pay attention to the damage that drugs cause. Schools might no longer educate young peopleeducate teenagers and adolescents about the negative effects drugs have on people, resulting in more teenagers experimenting with them, as they would believe that this is a normal aspect of life. This would result in more people with drug addictionsa higher number of drug addicts and potentially in more deaths, because it would be easier to obtain a large amount of illegal drugs and therefore the chances of overdosing would also increase.
In conclusion, I partially agree with the proposed action. Nonetheless, I think that an age restriction should be placed on drug use, as teenagers and adolescents could easily become addicted if all illegal drugs are legalised. This group of people is at high riskhighly at risk of becoming addicted and potentially dying as a result of drug use and therefore should only be allowed to consume drugs after reaching a certain age.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response is strongest in its clear qualified position and logically ordered consideration of legalisation's potential social and economic consequences. Its main limitation is that the age-restriction proposal appears only in the conclusion and is therefore not properly developed, while some phrasing is repetitive; the highest-priority improvement is to introduce this qualification earlier and connect every main point more directly to whether legalisation would solve the stated problem.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay addresses the question with a clear partial-agreement position and develops relevant benefits and risks.
Explain the proposed age restriction in the body and show more explicitly how it supports the qualified position.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically through introduction, advantages, disadvantages, and conclusion, with clear paragraph focus.
Create a firmer link between the final policy recommendation and the preceding discussion rather than introducing it at the end.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is sufficiently varied for the topic, but repetition and several awkward combinations reduce precision.
Vary repeated references to drugs and effects, and replace phrases such as better resources and highly at risk with more precise alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures with generally strong control and only occasional awkwardness.
Edit redundant or cumbersome constructions, particularly sentences containing multiple result and cause clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that the problem of illegal drugs can be solved by legalising all drugs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.