The older you get, life becomes more complicated. Discuss.

Sample Response

1

Ageing is a natural process happening to everyone. However, the bone of contention here is whether life becomesthe life becomes easier or more difficulteasier or difficult as years pass by. In my opinion, though life seems to be challenging as we grow old, we could make it happier by making use of ourmaking use our cognitive developmentprogression in our adult life. On the one handside, most people are of the opinionare of opinion that year after year, our lives get complicated. According to them, during our teenage years and adolescenceteenage and adolescence period, we are not carried away by worries related to family, finance and responsibilities, but as we grow older, issues like findingfetching a job, earning, saving, looking after our parents and children become a millstone on our shoulders. Another significant reason cited for why ageing is problematic is the occurrence of age-related disorders causingis the age-related disorders causing physical ailments like knee and joint pains, eye problems and indigestion. On the flip side, some people believe that ageing makes life more fruitful. They strongly believeThey are inclined to a strong point that a man gets moulded at every stage of life and it is an essential improvement. Being immature and without worries doesn’t actually define happiness, they claim. Rather, every individual could use their natural abilitiesboons such as intelligenceintelligent quotient and emotional quotient as an aid to effectively overcome the obstaclestactically solve the hurdles on their way. For instance, while we have a headache or fever, we might not know what to do when we are youngerduring our younger ages but as we grow old, we learngrow old we learn to take antibiotics or go to a physician. In the same way, every issue could be sorted out by everyone and life could be made happier. The freedom of decision making is a big difference in childhood and adulthoodgrownup time. When you grow older, you become the earning member and thus you have more freedom to maketake decisions. On the contrary, in childhood we rely on our parents' earningsour parents earning and hence they take most of our decisionsdecision and obligeobliged us to follow their wisheswish. To conclude, the older we become, the happier we are by exploring the world and by taking up responsibilities and this is facilitated by the maturity factor of ageing. So, we need to move on with life happily.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The essay presents a clear, nuanced view that ageing brings greater responsibilities and health problems but can also increase maturity, independence, and problem-solving ability. Its strongest feature is the range of relevant perspectives; however, frequent awkward collocations and grammatical errors reduce precision, and the entire response lacks paragraph breaks. The priority is to group the contrasting sides into clear paragraphs and express each example in simpler, more idiomatic language.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The discussion covers both increasing complications and the advantages of maturity, with a clear final view that later life can be happier.

Next step

Use a more credible example of mature problem-solving and explain directly how it offsets the burdens of health, work, and family.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

The contrast between burdens and benefits is easy to follow, but the one-block presentation and mechanical signposting limit cohesion.

Next step

Separate the introduction, complications, benefits, independence example, and conclusion into focused paragraphs with clear topic sentences.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.0
Scoring rule

A broad range of vocabulary is attempted, but frequent unnatural combinations and word choices reduce accuracy and clarity.

Next step

Replace phrases such as 'fetching a job', 'natural boons', and 'grownup time' with simple, idiomatic alternatives.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

Both simple and complex sentences are used, although article, preposition, agreement, possessive, and tense errors recur.

Next step

Proofread noun phrases and verb forms carefully, especially structures such as 'make use of', 'parents' earnings', and 'decisions'.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

The older you get, life becomes more complicated. Discuss.

Your response

Words0
40:00

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