Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Same questionCompare 2 different answers (Band 8–8.5)

Sample Response

1

The closure of numerous small, local shops due to their inability to compete with large supermarkets in many areas is a serious concernconcerning issue. This essay asserts that the ramifications of these closures on local communities are substantial and proposes measures to mitigate these adverse effects.

2

The closure of small local shops has a profound impactprofound impacts on the social and economic foundationsbase of communities. It leads to a loss of community identity and cohesion, as these shops often serve as social hubs where residents gather, fostering a sense of belonging. For instance, the closure of a neighbourhood grocery store not only affects access to goods but also disrupts social interactions and community relationships that develop in this shopwithin these spaces. This has far deeper social and economic consequences that negatively affect the community.

3

To address this problemalleviate this situation, governments and communities can implement measures to support small businesses. Initiatives such as providing subsidies, tax incentives, or low-interest loans can help small shops competeassist small shops in competing with larger retail chains. Moreover, fostering community support for local businesses through awareness campaigns or loyalty programmes can encourage residents to choose to shop locallyprioritize shopping locally. For example, community-led initiatives promoting the 'shop local' movement or organizing events that highlight the uniqueness of small businesses can increase local patronagestimulate patronage.

4

In conclusion, the closure of small, local shops has far-reaching implications, impacting the social fabric and economic vitality of communities. However, proactive measures such as governmentgovernmental support and community initiatives can mitigate these effects by bolstering small businesses and fostering community engagement, ultimately preserving the distinctive charactervibrant essence of local neighbourhoods.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.0

The response’s strongest feature is its direct coverage of both questions, with coherent solutions supported by specific and realistic measures. Its main limitation is that the economic effects of shop closures are asserted rather than fully explained, creating some repetition around broad consequences. The highest priority is to develop one concrete economic chain of impact, such as reduced local employment or money leaving the community.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.5
Scoring rule

Both questions are answered directly, with a developed social effect and several practical government and community solutions.

Next step

Explain the claimed economic impact through a specific cause-and-effect chain rather than stating it only in broad terms.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

8.0
Scoring rule

Information is logically grouped by effects and solutions, and ideas progress smoothly within a clear four-paragraph structure.

Next step

Make the link between the economic claim and its supporting detail more explicit to strengthen progression within the effects paragraph.

LR

Lexical Resource

8.0
Scoring rule

The response uses a wide and precise range of vocabulary for community cohesion, business support, and consumer behaviour.

Next step

Reduce repeated abstract phrases about broad consequences and use more concrete economic terms where possible.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

Complex structures are varied, flexible, and consistently well controlled, with punctuation supporting clarity throughout.

Next step

Keep long concluding sentences concise so that multiple clauses remain as sharply focused as the rest of the response.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Your response

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40:00

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