In recent years, there has been a significant increase in the number of oil drilling operations in remote locations around the world. This has brought economic benefits to some countries, though it has also raised concerns about the environmental impact of these operations. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
There is ongoing debate about whetherwhether or not nations should drill for oil in remote locations. While some argue that it is necessary to meet our ever-increasing energy demands, I would side with those who contend that the potential environmental damage to local communities outweighs any economic benefits.
On the one hand, drilling for oil in remote locations can increase oil productionfacilitate energy production. For example, the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge in Alaska is estimated to contain up to 12 billion barrels of oil, which could help reducewhich could help to reduce America’s dependence on foreign oil. Other nations have similar reserves that can meet ordinary people’s energy needspressing demands for the average person. The drilling operations in these remote locations will alsosimultaneously create jobs and stimulate economic growth in the surrounding area. As economic conditions improve, energy needs will rise accordinglyconcomitantly rise and increased drilling can potentially create a cycle that benefits both locals and the country as a wholea given country at large.
On the other hand, drilling for oil in remote locations has significant environmental consequences. The process of extracting oil can lead to the release of greenhouse gases and other harmful pollutants into the atmosphere, contributing to climate change. For instance, the Canadian oil sands, which are located in unpopulated areas of Alberta, are one of the largest sources of greenhouse gas emissions in the world. In additionRelatedly, drilling can have negative effects on the health and wellbeing of nearby communities, particularly indigenous populations. In the Canadian exampleIn the above-mentioned example, some of the oil has been extracted through the controversial practice of fracking which contaminates local water supplies in areas with large Indigenous populationslocal water supplies where native population rates are high.
In conclusion, while drilling for oil in remote locations may provide temporary economic benefits, the long-term costs to the environment and local communities are too severesignificant. Instead, governments should prioritize the development of sustainable energy sources that will help to ensure a cleaner, healthier future for all.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response presents a clear position, develops both perspectives with relevant examples, and maintains a confident, logically structured argument. Its main limitation is occasional imprecision in the supporting logic and phrasing, particularly where economic growth, energy demand, and effects on Indigenous communities are linked. Refining those causal connections and choosing more exact wording would make an already strong discussion more rigorous.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both sides are addressed directly, the position is consistent, and the main ideas receive relevant explanation and examples.
Make each causal claim fully precise, especially the proposed cycle linking drilling, growth, and rising energy needs.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument progresses clearly through well-focused paragraphs, with cohesive devices used effectively and unobtrusively.
Strengthen the logical bridge between a few adjacent claims so that progression depends less on broad connective wording.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide-ranging and generally precise, with effective topic-specific choices and natural control of less common language.
Replace occasional awkward or imprecise phrases, such as references to population rates, with exact descriptions of the intended relationship.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide variety of complex structures is handled accurately, and the few minor lapses do not impede communication.
Polish punctuation and relative-clause phrasing in the longest sentences to make their relationships completely unambiguous.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In recent years, there has been a significant increase in the number of oil drilling operations in remote locations around the world. This has brought economic benefits to some countries, though it has also raised concerns about the environmental impact of these operations. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.