Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings? What is your viewpoint on this issue? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Sample Response
Some may agreeacquiesce with the fact that replacing old structures with modern buildingscontemporary monuments is a good idea while others may not support this viewcondone with this. However, I firmlycandidly believe that historic structures should be preserved. This essay outlines the coherent reasons for doing so. Industrialization has evolved, thus leading to an insatiable desire for wealth. The demolition of old buildingsDemolishing of old buildings to create space forfor spaces to build casinos and hotels has become commonhas been a norm these days. Old buildings are a depiction of our nationalnative history for example:for example; the Jalian Wala Bagh in Amritsar showsAmritsar, shows the people who lost their lives, and this can revivethis revives patriotism in the youth. The Taj Mahal in India, a monument of love serves as an example of unconditional love. These are emblems which will assist children to learn history. In New Zealand, ancient earthenwareold earth pots were discovered at historic sitesdiscovered from old monuments, that helped assess which cereals our ancestors ate. Secondly, History revitalizes the tourism industry, an instance of this is the Fort Jesus Museum in Mombasa, Kenya. A huge number of local and foreign tourists pay a visit to the museum regularly. This thus leads to growth in the local economyan appreciation of the local currency and cross-cultural exchangepollination, therefore bringing a country to a path of economic growtha trajectory model. The funds raised through tourism may be used for refurbishing the old structures. To recapitulate it all, I firmly believe historical structures are a heritage of any country. Thereby destroying them is like unleashing a lethal war on our history. An example is better than a precept, and history can, therefore, be taught by the use of old monuments.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay maintains a clear position in favour of preservation and supports it with relevant historical, educational, and tourism examples. Its main limitation is precision: several examples are connected through assertions rather than fully explained reasoning, while forced vocabulary and sentence-boundary errors sometimes obscure the logic. Prioritise developing two reasons step by step and replacing inflated expressions with direct, accurate language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear pro-preservation position is maintained and supported with relevant reasons and examples, though some claims are asserted rather than fully explained.
Explain explicitly how one historical example supports education and how one tourism example creates lasting public value before moving to the next point.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a recognisable introduction, history, tourism, and conclusion sequence, but the single paragraph and mechanical linking weaken progression.
Use separate paragraphs for the two main reasons and replace repeated connectors such as "thus" and "therefore" with clearer logical transitions.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a broad range of vocabulary, but frequent miscollocations such as "acquiesce with," "cross-cultural pollination," and "trajectory model" reduce precision.
Prefer direct, conventional wording such as "agree with," "cultural exchange," and "economic growth" throughout.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms conveys the main ideas, although comma splices, fragments, and faulty clause structures occur repeatedly.
Separate run-on examples into complete sentences and revise fragments such as "Thereby destroying them" into fully controlled clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings? What is your viewpoint on this issue? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.