Many old buildings protected by law are part of a nation’s history. Some people think they should be knocked down and replaced by new ones. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Ancient buildings are relics of the past and should be preserved, in the view of some people. Others, however, believe that the appearance of modern buildings will open a new horizon for the development of a nation. My essay will discuss the validity of both sides.
The ancient houses are, first, believed to be a repositorybelieved to the reservoir of the glorious past of a nation. With their existence along each road, it is undeniable that no sooner does the younger generationyoung generation grow up than they become proud of their country’s admirable history of the pastold-day history through the images of roofs, ceilings and wallsimage of roof, ceiling and walls. Philosophically speaking, like a person who clings to the past to reflect, views the present to enjoy and contemplates the future, a city itself entails an inextricable link of these three dimensions of timethese three-time axes to revise, thrive and fly. Nevertheless, in the case of derelict old housesin case of derelict old houses, such an experiencesuch experience of living in these shelters could be a nightmare to quite a few people, for instance, residents of Hanoifor instance, Hanoi people who are suffering a poor quality of lifea low-quality life in an ancient street. It is a common situationa common-scene to some that three to four households have only one toilet system with the layers of paint on their wallstheir wall painting layers bound to peel off and their ceilings sagging owing to weathering.
Another rationale is that these old houses are symbols of unique architecturesymbolic of the unique architecture and serve as a mental panacea for hurry-sickness city-dwellers. Hardly can the modern-day people recreate such beauty as that createdsuch beauties as that by famous architects of the pastarchitects of yesterdays who utilized traditional materialsthe past materials, and for that reason, some streets adorned with second-to-none buildings are ideal destinations for visitors from around the worldthe visitors world-wide to immersesavour themselves in the sense of serene old days. To those who are caught up in a hectic lifesucking in a life of craze, the tiny old houses resemble oases to ease their stress. Opponents have their points in the belief that as a result of the rapid population growthexplosion of population, so crowded do streets turn out that these old, unsafe and dirty houses should be demolished to give way to skyscrapers to accommodate an ever-increasing number of people who flock to the city in the hope of a better life. Also, not until the cities are paved with modern buildings and wide roads do investors from other continents pay greater attention, which, in turn, generates a huge amount of profit for the entire nation.
In the final analysis, each idea has its own reasoning, but in my opinion, the presence of old houses is essential to the survival of any city for their originality and unforgettable destinations of travel lovers.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response offers several substantive reasons for preserving historic buildings while also recognising housing and development pressures, and its conclusion gives a definite view. However, that position is not established clearly at the outset, and dense, highly figurative sentences often obscure otherwise relevant ideas. The priority is to state the stance early and express each supporting point in shorter, more natural, accurately controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Relevant arguments on preservation and redevelopment are developed, and the conclusion gives a clear preference for retaining old buildings.
State the degree of agreement in the introduction and maintain that position explicitly while evaluating the opposing case.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument has an identifiable progression, but very long body paragraphs and overloaded sentences weaken clarity and balance.
Divide the discussion into shorter, single-purpose paragraphs and use clearer topic sentences for preservation and redevelopment.
Lexical Resource
The response demonstrates a broad vocabulary and attempts vivid expression, though several collocations are unnatural or imprecise.
Prefer conventional academic phrasing and replace strained expressions such as hurry-sickness and sucking in a life of craze.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures and varied sentence patterns are frequent, but errors in articles, clauses, agreement, and inversion recur.
Use shorter complex sentences and check the grammatical frame of each clause before adding inversion or extended modification.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many old buildings protected by law are part of a nation’s history. Some people think they should be knocked down and replaced by new ones. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.