Some people opine that increasing office hour is a reason for many social and personal problems and that is why it should be reduced to 35 hours in a week. What are the advantages and disadvantages of reducing the working week to 35 hours?
Sample Response
Social and personal problems caused by overworkDifferent social and personal problems due to overwork are arguably the most concerning challengesdilemmas in the modern world, in both developing and industrialised countriesboth for developing and industrialised countries. It is suggested by many to have a 35-hours workweek schedule, as they believe it would help diminish many overwork-related issues. This essay will analysegive an in-depth analysis of both advantages and disadvantages of the proposed working hours. It seems reasonable that a shorter working week can boost the demand for new employment while also providingprovide healthier working conditionsa healthier working condition. As workers are expected to work five hours less per week, companiesthe companies have to consider additional recruitment to keep up with previous productivity levelsthe former productivity, thus helping to lowerthus help in lowering the unemployment ratequota. Moreover, studies have highlighted the importance of granting employees a greater amount of time to resttime for resting. Not only will this leadNot only it will lead to better performance, but it will also improvebut also improve employee satisfaction, from which the organisations can benefit substantiallybenefit a lot. On the other hand, there are bound to be pitfalls once the suggestion gets passed. Economically speaking, cutting working hours can severely hurt companies’ competitiveness in the market, since they are no longer as effective. The situation may get even worse if all firms suffer from the same problem. Prices are then likely to be raised so that the expenses can be covered. Ironically, the employees, who are also customers, turn out again to be the victims of the solution suggested. To conclude, limiting the working week to 35 hours might sound promising but there are several potential issues, which must be thoroughly addressed before the proposal cancould be implemented in the real world.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response gives a balanced and relevant account of shorter-week benefits and drawbacks, with a logical chain from employment and wellbeing to competitiveness and consumer prices. Its strongest feature is the clear development of consequences, but the absence of visible paragraph breaks and recurring grammatical slips reduce polish; separating the argument into distinct paragraphs and correcting clause patterns would improve readability and control most effectively.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both advantages and disadvantages are addressed clearly, and the main points are extended through relevant cause-and-effect reasoning.
Add a little more qualification or concrete support to the economic claims so the analysis feels fully persuasive rather than largely hypothetical.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument progresses logically and linking is generally effective, but presenting the entire response as one block weakens structural clarity.
Use separate introduction, advantage, disadvantage, and conclusion paragraphs so the strong progression is immediately visible to the reader.
Lexical Resource
A varied academic vocabulary communicates the argument flexibly, despite occasional awkward or imprecise collocations.
Refine phrases such as unemployment quota, former productivity, and the suggestion gets passed into more natural academic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts a good range of complex forms, but errors in parallel structures, inversion, and verb patterns recur across the essay.
Correct constructions such as while also providing, thus helping, and not only will it lead so complex sentences remain consistently accurate.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people opine that increasing office hour is a reason for many social and personal problems and that is why it should be reduced to 35 hours in a week. What are the advantages and disadvantages of reducing the working week to 35 hours?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.