The charts below show the percentage of the energy generate from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003.
Sample Response
The proportionsinvolvement of various energy sources in the generation of powerPower in a country inbetween 1985 and 2003 is illustrated in the pie charts. To begin with, the shareShare of oil remained the highest during the period, as it was 52% in 1985 and fellreduced to 39% by 2003. Further, Power produced from natural gases contributed merely 13% in 1985 had shared around a quarter by 2003. A similar trend was also observed in coalcoal energy, with an increase of five percentage pointsan increment of 5% in the 18-year periodthe period of 18 years.
In contrast to this, In 2003, 17% share of total Power was of nuclear energy which was accounted for 22% in 1985.
It is evident from the charts that no change occurredthere was no change had been occurred in the share of hydrogen-generated powerPower from hydrogen energy over the periodduring the span of period. Although, an only slight increase was seen in the other renewable energy sources in around two decades, by 3%.
OverallOverall, over time, a positive pattern was noticed in the case of oil, natural gas, coal and other renewable energy sourcesother renewable energy sources of Power and a declinea negative pattern in the case of nuclear Power while hydrogen’s share remained unchangedno change has happened in hydrogen energy.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response reports nearly all categories with accurate figures and clearly recognises oil as the largest source in both years. Its main weakness is the final overview's incorrect claim that oil followed a positive pattern, compounded by frequent grammatical and collocational errors; the priority is to state the overall trends accurately and express comparisons in clean, complete sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Most figures and changes are accurately reported, but the overview incorrectly groups declining oil with the increasing sources.
State that oil and nuclear power fell, natural gas, coal, and other renewables rose, and hydrogen remained unchanged.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically ordered and generally easy to follow, though paragraphing and connectors are sometimes mechanical or unsuitable.
Place the overview after the introduction and group rising, falling, and stable sources into balanced comparison paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for describing proportions and trends, but awkward collocations and unnecessary capitalisation reduce precision.
Prefer natural phrases such as accounted for, increased by, and electricity generation, while keeping common nouns lowercase.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning remains mostly clear, but errors in verb forms, clause structure, articles, and sentence fragments occur frequently.
Revise each comparison for a complete subject-verb structure and avoid combining passive forms with unnecessary perfect auxiliaries.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The charts below show the percentage of the energy generate from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.