The bar chart below shows the number of houses built per year in two cities, Derby and Nottingham, between 2000 and 2009.
Sample Response
The graph compares two cities in England namely Derby and Nottingham by the number of houses built each yearin terms of the number of houses built each year, from 2000 to 2009.
Overall, the figures for both Derby and Nottingham showedboth sets of figures for Derby and Nottingham witnessed an upward trend over the ten-year period. However, while the number of houses built each year in Derby either increased or stayed the same, the figures for Nottingham saw greater fluctuations.
In 2000, the number of newly built homes in Derby was just under 50, and steadily increased over the next three years to reach around 125 houses in 2003. The figures then remained the same for the next four years before rising sharplydramatically increasing in 2008 and 2009, to reach a figure of approximately 350 homes by the end of the period.
However, the figures for Nottingham followed a rather different pattern. Between 2000 and 2005 the figures for newly built homes fluctuated around 50, before dropping to about 10almost 0 in 2006. A large increase of almost 200 newly built houses was seen in 2007, but the figure then once again dropped to around 2010 houses in 2008. 2009 witnessed another surge in the number of new houses, with the figure peaking at 250.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response gives a clear overview and accurately selects the main trends, contrasts, and most relevant figures, with especially effective coverage of Derby’s steady rise and Nottingham’s volatility. Its main limitation is that some supporting values are presented broadly rather than precisely, particularly Nottingham’s early fluctuations. The highest-priority improvement is to sharpen comparisons between the two cities at key turning points while retaining the concise structure.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and accurate selection of the principal trends and figures provide strong coverage of the chart.
Make a few more direct cross-city comparisons at key years and state Nottingham’s early values more precisely.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically grouped into an overview and separate city-focused paragraphs, with smooth progression throughout.
Strengthen cohesion further by explicitly linking the cities at major turning points such as 2007 and 2008.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and precise, including effective trend language such as fluctuated, surge, and peaking.
Reduce repetition of figures and houses by using a slightly wider range of accurate comparative expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, with only negligible punctuation or phrasing lapses.
Refine punctuation around inserted identifying phrases, such as the reference to the two English cities.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The bar chart below shows the number of houses built per year in two cities, Derby and Nottingham, between 2000 and 2009.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.