The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.
Sample Response
The bar chart details drinking habits in 5 Australian cities as they relate to coffee and tea over the last 4 weeks. Overall, more than half the population in all cities except Adelaide went to a cafe for coffee or tea, while buying instant coffee was also popular and buying fresh coffee generally less common.
Looking first of all at going to cafes, it was most characteristic of Melbourne and Hobart at 64% and 63%, respectively. Sydney was comparably high at just over 60%, followed by Brisbane at over 55%, and finally Adelaide at under 50%. Adelaide was the only city where people bought more instant coffee by a slight margin (50%). In Hobart, instant coffee purchases stood at 54%, ahead of Brisbane at 52%, Melbourne at 48% and lastly Sydney (just over 45%).
Stocking up on fresh coffee was below 45% for all cities. It was most common in Sydney (44%) and Melbourne (42%). Hobart was next at 39%, and Adelaide and Brisbane were much lower and nearly level at around 34%.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Specify the activities Original: as they relate to coffee and tea Suggested revision: covering coffee and tea purchases and café visits Why it matters: This wording identifies the buying and café-going activities shown in the chart more precisely.
- 2. Use a concise transition Original: Looking first of all at going to cafes Suggested revision: Turning first to café visits Why it matters: A shorter transition makes the shift to the first category more direct.
- 3. Use natural comparison Original: most characteristic of Suggested revision: most common in Why it matters: The revised collocation describes the highest proportions more naturally.
- 4. Complete the comparison Original: and lastly Sydney (just over 45%) Suggested revision: and lastly Sydney, at just over 45% Why it matters: The preposition is needed to connect Sydney clearly to its percentage.
- 5. Use precise wording Original: Stocking up on fresh coffee Suggested revision: Buying fresh coffee Why it matters: The chart records whether people bought fresh coffee, not how much they stocked.
- 6. Clarify the ranking Original: Hobart was next at 39% Suggested revision: Hobart followed at 39% Why it matters: The revised verb expresses Hobart's position in the ranking more directly.
- 7. Sentence rewrite Original: Adelaide was the only city where people bought more instant coffee by a slight margin (50%). Suggested revision: Adelaide was the only city where the proportion buying instant coffee, at 50%, was slightly higher than the proportion visiting cafés. Why it matters: The original does not state what instant-coffee purchases exceeded, whereas the chart shows they narrowly surpassed café visits.
- 8. Sharpen the overview Suggested revision: State that café visits were the leading activity in four cities and that instant coffee purchases exceeded fresh coffee purchases in every city. Why it matters: These two cross-city patterns provide a more specific summary of the chart's main features.
Suggested Rewrites
- as they relate to coffee and tea covering coffee and tea purchases and café visits
- Looking first of all at going to cafes Turning first to café visits
- most characteristic of most common in
- and lastly Sydney (just over 45%) and lastly Sydney, at just over 45%
- Stocking up on fresh coffee Buying fresh coffee
- Hobart was next at 39% Hobart followed at 39%
Why this response received Band 8.5
This is a concise, well-organised report whose overview and detailed comparisons accurately capture the main patterns across the five cities. The main limitation is that a few descriptions are slightly imprecise, such as grouping Adelaide and Brisbane at around 34% when Adelaide is closer to 35%. Prioritise exact but selective numerical comparisons and slightly more natural phrasing to make an already strong response fully precise.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and accurately selects and compares virtually all significant features of the chart.
Refine the few approximations by distinguishing Adelaide's fresh-coffee figure from Brisbane's slightly lower result.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses naturally from the overview to the cafe and instant-coffee comparisons and then to fresh-coffee purchases.
Use an even smoother transition into the final category so the progression feels entirely effortless.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied, precise, and well suited to comparing proportions, with only occasional slightly informal or awkward choices.
Replace phrases such as 'stocking up on' and 'most characteristic of' with more neutral statistical wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is used accurately and flexibly throughout, with no meaningful loss of control.
Maintain this strong control while varying comparative clause structures a little further.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.