The chart below shows the sales of handmade olive oil soaps to tourists in Turkey in 2015.
Sample Response
The line graph shows the sales ofreveals data on the sales amount of handmade olive oil soaps sold to touristswhich were sold to the tourists in Turkey in 2015. The sales aresale amount is given in millions of Turkish lirain million lira. Overall,It is obvious that the highest sales were made in March 2015 while the average sales amount per month ranged from 100 to 200 million lira. Turning to the detailsGetting back to the details, Turkish olive oil soap makers recorded sales of 200 million lirasold soaps of 200 million Lira to touriststo the visitors in January 2015 and this figure rose sharply to 350 million lirawhich skyrocketed to 350 million Lira in March. Sales fell sharplyThe sales amount nosedived in the subsequent months and the decline continued until Julythe drop continued until the July when sales reachedwhen it dipped to just over 100 million lirajust over 100 million sales amount. During this time each month's sale declined by 50 million lira. Sales in August went up and it recorded twice as much sales amount as it was in the last month only to decline in the next month. After remaining stable in November, sales edged upWith a slight increase, sales nearly reached 200 million lirathe sales amount nearly touched the 200 million lira again in December.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response follows the yearly movement clearly, identifies March as the peak, and uses a suitable range of trend vocabulary. However, the overview misstates the scale of the monthly values and some changes are overgeneralised, especially the claim that every fall to July was 50 million lira. Check each plotted figure carefully and describe approximate changes with precise, natural phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main peak and broad sequence of rises and falls are covered, but the overview's stated range is inaccurate and several monthly changes lack precision.
Give an accurate overview of the 125-to-350-million range and verify the differing falls between March and July.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a clear chronological progression with generally effective linking, though presenting everything in one paragraph limits organisation.
Use a separate overview and divide the monthly detail into early-year and later-year periods.
Lexical Resource
There is a good range of trend language, but repeated use of sales amount and several unnatural collocations reduce lexical control.
Replace repetitive phrases with precise alternatives such as sales, revenue, the figure, and sales rose to.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are attempted successfully and meaning remains clear, although article, comparison, and clause-structure errors recur.
Edit structures such as until July and twice the previous month's figure for greater grammatical accuracy.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the sales of handmade olive oil soaps to tourists in Turkey in 2015.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.