At many companies today, applicants are often rejected due to old age. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Sample Response
As many companies now value younger employees for their innovative mindset, many older employees find themselves rejected due to their age. I believe that this is a serious negative development with many adverse implications.
Firstly, rejecting applicants based solely on agebased on old age alone can lead to many consequences. The most critical one being massive unemployment with many negative results. For example, when older applicants cannot find jobs, they cannot support themselves and their families. As a result, society would face widespread financial hardshipsociety would witness multiple financial crises. Also, this wouldwill affect future generations because their parents would most likely be unable to affordas their parents most likely could not afford to pay for tuition. Another consequence would be that rejecting applicants based on age would mean discrimination based on a personal characteristicelement. This violation of human rights would set a precedent forserve as a precedent for further unfair treatmentmuch more unfair treatment in the workplace, such as discrimination based on gender, race, or sexual orientation.
Secondly, I believe rejecting applicants based entirely on their age will eliminate many capable candidatesmany potential ones. Many industries, especially science, have practical techniquestips and tricks that are not taught inat schools. For example, many labs still hire olderold applicants because they have experience operating and fixing equipment that many recentfresh graduates would not be familiar with. Another reason is that older employees usually have wider professional networksusually have more connections. These connections, more often than not, can help them complete tasks more quicklycomplete tasks quicker than younger employees. For example, in the banking industry, to meet the KPI, bankers need to reach a minimum amount of money lent to businesses or individuals. Because older employees are more likely to have professional connections with successful business ownersconnections with successful business owners, they can meet this target more effectivelyaccomplish this task better.
In conclusion, I believe that rejecting applicants solely because of agedue to old age is highly unethical and has no legitimate justificationfoundation.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response maintains a clear negative position and supports it with two well-developed lines of argument, using relevant workplace examples and a logical overall structure. Its main limitation is imprecise or exaggerated phrasing in places, alongside some awkward references and grammatical shifts that reduce polish. Focus first on expressing consequences more accurately and controlling sentence structure and tense consistently while preserving the strong development.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The negative position is explicit throughout, and both social harm and lost workplace value are developed with relevant examples.
Qualify broad claims about unemployment and financial crises so that the reasoning remains persuasive and proportionate.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear logical sequence and effective paragraphing, although some references and transitions are slightly mechanical or vague.
Clarify references such as the most critical one and potential ones so each sentence connects precisely to the preceding idea.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and often effective, but several choices are informal, repetitive, or insufficiently precise for the context.
Replace vague phrases such as negative results and tips and tricks with specific, formal terms that express the intended meaning exactly.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are used with generally clear meaning, but fragments and inconsistent tense or modal choices reduce accuracy.
Turn dependent fragments into complete sentences and maintain a consistent time frame when describing likely consequences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
At many companies today, applicants are often rejected due to old age. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.