As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Businesses have always sought to generate profitsmake a profit, but it is becoming increasingly common to hear growing discussion ofhear people talk about the social obligations that companies have. I completely agree with the idea that businesses should do more for society than simply make money.
On the one hand, I accept that businesses must make money in order to survive in a competitive world. It seems logical that the priority of any company should be to cover its running costs, such as employees’ wages, property costs and utility billsemployees’ wages and payments for buildings and utilities. Beyond covering these costsOn top of these costs, companies also need to invest in improvement and innovationimprovements and innovations if they wish to remain successful. If a company is unable to pay its bills or meet customers’ changing needsthe changing needs of customers, any concerns about social responsibilities become irrelevant. In other words, a company can only contribute positively to societymake a positive contribution to society if it is in good financial health.
On the other hand, companies should not be run with the sole aim of maximising profit; they have a wider role to play in society. One social obligation that owners and managers have is to treat their employees well, rather than exploiting them. For example, they could pay a “living wage” to ensure that workers have a good quality of life. Businesses could also useI also like the idea that businesses could use a proportion of their profits to support local charities, environmental projects or education initiatives. Finally, instead of trying to minimise their tax payments by using accounting loopholes, I believe that company leadersbosses should be willinghappy to contribute to society through the tax system.
In conclusion, I believe that companies should place as much importance on their social responsibilities as they do on their financial objectives.
Why this response received Band 9.0
The response is strongest in its clear, consistent position and balanced development of why financial viability enables, but should not replace, social responsibility. Its main limitation is that several social contributions are presented as plausible proposals rather than examined in much depth. The highest-priority refinement is to develop one such example more analytically, showing its concrete impact and relationship to the central claim.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses the question with a clear position and relevant ideas that are extended and supported throughout.
Deepen one social-responsibility example by tracing its practical effect on society to make the support even more analytical.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a purposeful introduction, two well-focused body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion, with cohesive devices used naturally.
Refine the transition between financial necessity and wider obligations so their complementary relationship is even more explicit.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide-ranging, precise, and natural, including effective topic-specific language about financial health, living wages, and accounting loopholes.
Continue refining collocational precision when describing how businesses allocate profits and contribute through taxation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used flexibly and accurately, with consistently controlled punctuation and sentence formation.
Maintain this high level of control while varying the placement of subordinate clauses to create still greater rhythmic flexibility.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.