Some people say that computer games are bad for children by all means, others believe that these games are contributing to children’s development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
Children nowadays spend several hours playing video games; since the last few years these games have become increasingly popular. While some experts think that these games corrupt the brain, others feelsome others also feel that computer games may actually teach childrenkids high-level thinking skills for thetheir future. This essay shall consider both perspectives and end at a personal approach.
Parents usually complain that their child is addictedcomplain of their child being addicted to video games, for example, by playing for two hours at a timelike playing for 2 hours at a stretch, but in practicebut practically but the amount of time is not the central issuethe time issue is a red herring. This is a normal time for a child to play – whether video games or something elsevideo game or otherwise. Another concern is that these games are too violentAnother issue is of these games being too violent. Although there’s no concrete research linking violent games to violence in real life, common sense says we should limit a child’s exposure becauseas such games glamorize violence and are not realistic. Playing video games can be considered to be an addiction or detrimental if it disrupts or compromises other important things in children’s life, for instance if they can’t concentrate on their homework because of gaming or have no friendships.
When a child plays video games, it gives his brain a real workout. In many video games, the skills required to win involve abstract and high level thinking. In shooting games, the character may be running and shooting at the same time, thereby developingwhich develops hand-eye coordination, fine motor and spatial skills. In strategy games, for example, while developing a city, an unexpected eventsurprise like an enemy attack might emerge. This forces the player to be flexible and quickly change tactics, think quickly, and analyse situations rapidlyquickly change tactics enabling quick thinking and making fast analysis. Because of all these factors, video games are deemed to be more beneficial than harmfulmore constructive than harming.
In closing, I’d say computer games are contributing to children’s development, though in an unconventional wayunconventional sort of way. We cannot deny that we are now living in a high-tech, sophisticated world, soworld so an all-out negative attitude towards computer gaming is not reasonable. A balanced approach to gamingLevel-headedness in such matters can help curb the damaging effects.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is strongest in its specific, well-developed examples showing both the risks and cognitive benefits of gaming, and it maintains a clear opinion in the conclusion. Some reasoning is uneven—the dismissal of time concerns is asserted rather than fully justified—and several awkward phrases and sentence-level slips weaken polish. Prioritise sharper development of the negative case and revise complex sentences for natural, precise expression.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views are discussed with relevant explanation and examples, and the writer's favourable but qualified opinion is clear.
Develop the negative perspective more consistently, especially the claim that time spent gaming is not a genuine concern.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically organised into purposeful paragraphs with clear progression and generally effective referencing.
Tighten the links between claims and evidence so that qualifications do not interrupt the argument's flow.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and often precise, including effective topic-specific language, despite several unnatural collocations.
Refine phrases such as making fast analysis and more constructive than harming into idiomatic academic English.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses varied complex sentences, but recurring errors in phrasing, articles, agreement, and clause connection reduce control.
Edit long sentences for clean clause boundaries and correct small grammatical slips before adding further complexity.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that computer games are bad for children by all means, others believe that these games are contributing to children’s development. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.