Some people think that only governments can make significant changes in society, while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?
Sample Response
Alterations in the society can be brought by government and sometimes by individuals too, think people. However, it is true that society is made up of every individualsociety is made by every single person but controlled by the governmentcontrolled by government. Although individuals can make changes but the ideas and will of every person differ; therefore government not only has to spread the awareness among people but it also has to impose new laws, which everyone has to follow or is compelled to follow, in order to make society an excellent place to inhabit. Some people like to invest their own belongings to make their society better while some are reluctant just because they think the government should meetfulfill their needs particularly the basic ones. For instance, two peoplepersons living on the same streetin a same street: one throws the garbage in the bin that he has placedthe dustbin which he himself has planted outside his home. The other throwsOther throws his garbage on the road of the same street and thinks that a government employeeany government servant will come and clean the street. So, by these two opposite actions the society cannot be cleaned because the hard work of one person will go in vainvein just because of the actions of the other personaction on another person. Government has the power to make people aware of what is harmful and what is beneficialthings which harm and which are beneficial for the society. For example, government should raise awarenessshould spread the awareness through things like media and home to home surveys. This will reduce the negatives in society and increase the positives. In addition to the government's range of authority, the government can introduce new lawsgovernment can duce new laws and can compelbound people to follow them. Like, if one's idea or will of benefiting society does not match another's idea then it does not matter because government wants them to follow what it wants them to follow. By doing this, opposition of one another will vanish. To conclude, despite individual disagreementsindividuals' clash in changing society, the government can make them do the same work which would be beneficial to societyconstructive for the sovereignty. I believe if citizens abide by the lawsabide the laws which are promulgated my government then the society will be as clean as a whistle. written By: "M.H.KHAN." fb/twitter/instagram,etc: "mhkhanbangash"
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a consistent view that governments have the greatest capacity to improve society, and the street-cleaning example gives the argument a concrete focus. However, the discussion is repetitive and oversimplifies how public influence works, while frequent vocabulary and grammar errors weaken precision. Develop distinct reasons for governmental effectiveness and acknowledge the role individuals can still play, using clearer sentence structures throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The opinion is clear and relevant support is provided, but the case for government action is repetitive and the individual perspective receives limited evaluation.
Develop two distinct reasons for the position and directly explain how individual influence compares with governmental power.
Coherence and Cohesion
The central argument is generally traceable, although progression is weakened by repetition, loose referencing, and mechanical linking.
Organise each body paragraph around one reason and use explicit logical links between the example, its consequence, and the main claim.
Lexical Resource
Some less common vocabulary is attempted, but frequent inaccurate word choices and collocations make parts of the argument awkward.
Choose familiar, precise terms for government action and social cooperation, and verify collocations before using more ambitious words.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple and complex forms are both attempted, but recurring errors in articles, agreement, punctuation, and clause formation limit accuracy.
Revise sentence by sentence for complete clauses, correct verb patterns, and accurate article and preposition use.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that only governments can make significant changes in society, while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.