In Some Countries, People Spend Long Hours at Work. Why Does This Happen? Is It a Positive or Negative Development
Sample Response
For the betterment of life, individuals like to do various types of workmiscellaneous types of works. In this day and age, it is irrefutable that an increasing number of people are spendingdevoting more time at work than ever before. It has both merits and demerits but this essay will highlight that latter of this approach surpass the former one.
At the outset, for earning greener and pasture plebeians like to do long hours of work. In thisBecause in this competitive world it is mandatory for everyone to do a lot of hard work. For exampleTo substantiate it, due to inflation peoplefolk like to spend long hours at workat their work to attainattaining a lavish lifestyle. FurthermoreMoving further, sometimes people want to gain extensive knowledgeacquire heaps of knowledge. Therefore, to broaden their horizonsbroaden the horizon and paveas well as paves the way for a dazzling future they have to do work long hourslong-time work. Without diligence and determination, they cannot achieve anything in their liveslife.
On the flip side, if peoplehomo-sapiens spend long hours at the workplace then the consequences can be severerepercussions of this are worse. First and foremost, they cannot spend quality timespend their quality time with their near and dear ones. Consequently, it reduces their bondtheir relationship bond between them. Apart from it, a long time period at work put a devastating
.3g effect on their health. Owing to this they face several ailments, depression, anxiety, insomniaInsomnia, to name but a few. A survey was *0conducted that in China, the majority of people died in road accidents because they spend long hours at their workplace and do not get proper sleep.
To recapitulate briefly, working overtime is primarily attributed to the demand for higher work efficiency and promotional aspirations. On the other hand, taking too much time to work and definitely has a negative impact on people’s health as well as their products.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response presents a clear negative view and gives relevant reasons for long working hours, particularly financial pressure, along with effects on health and relationships. Its main limitation is that several ideas rely on vague or implausible support, while frequent awkward word choices and sentence errors weaken clarity. Prioritise developing one credible explanation and example for each main point in simpler, accurately controlled language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both questions and maintains a negative position, but several reasons and consequences are only partly developed or supported unconvincingly.
Develop each main reason with a clear causal explanation and a realistic, directly relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The paragraph sequence is broadly logical, though mechanical linking, a sentence fragment, and the disrupted health paragraph weaken the flow.
Use fewer formulaic linkers and ensure each sentence connects grammatically and logically to the preceding idea.
Lexical Resource
There is an attempt to use varied vocabulary, but frequent inappropriate collocations and word choices sometimes obscure the intended meaning.
Prefer precise, natural phrases such as financial security and family relationships instead of ornate or incorrectly used vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex structures are attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, sentence formation, articles, and verb patterns reduce accuracy and clarity.
Build complete sentences with accurate subject-verb agreement and verb forms before adding more complex clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In Some Countries, People Spend Long Hours at Work. Why Does This Happen? Is It a Positive or Negative Development
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.