Some people argue that the government should give every unemployed person a mobile phone and should make sure they have access to the Internet. They believe this is the best way of using public money to reduce the problem of unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Unemployment causes many problems for society. Individuals suffer not only economically, but also in terms of their self-respect and even health. Inevitably, when a family's main earner is unemployedwhen the breadwinner is unemployed, other family members are also affectedbecome victims too. Young people without job prospects may turn to drugs or crime to escape boredom and poverty. For all these reasons, any measures thatwhich can reduce unemployment should be welcomedare to be welcomed. The first priority for athe job seeker is information, and here the Internet offers a valuableunique tool. Details of job vacancies and training schemes can be accessed online within minuteswithin minutes on a computer screen, saving time and money that would otherwise be spent visiting employment agencies or buying newspapers. In addition, the Internet can be very useful in preparing for job interviews. Once a suitable job vacancy has been identified, it is vitalit's vital to respond quickly, and in this respect, it can be argued that a mobile phone is more convenient than a landlinea conventional phone. Since calls on a mobile can be very expensive, however, costs can easily get out of hand unless they are monitored carefully. It has to be said that, like allany tools, the Internet and the mobile phone are only as effective as their usersas good as their user. Both need to be used effectively, and of course both are open to abuse. There is little point in making technology available, therefore, without providing basic training in using it. In conclusion, I believe there are strong arguments for giving unemployed people access to the Internet. However, the case for providing mobile phones is less convincing, and it may be more cost-effective in the long run to invest in relevant training programmes.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response’s strongest feature is its balanced, persuasive evaluation of Internet access, mobile phones and training, supported by precise reasoning and highly controlled language. The main limitation is presentation: nearly all substantive ideas appear in one long paragraph, so the argument’s stages are less visible than they could be. The highest priority is to divide the discussion into purposeful body paragraphs while preserving the concise, nuanced analysis.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly evaluates both proposed technologies, sustains a nuanced position and supports it with relevant practical reasoning.
Strengthen the policy comparison further by explicitly weighing this spending against one alternative unemployment measure.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress smoothly through benefits, limitations and a qualified conclusion, but the main discussion is presented as one long paragraph.
Separate the Internet case, the mobile-phone reservation and the training alternative into purposeful paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide, precise and natural, with effective control of policy, employment and technology language.
Refine the occasional general expression by using the most exact term for the policy or cost being compared.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex sentence forms is used accurately, flexibly and with consistently clear punctuation.
Maintain this control while checking that pronoun references remain maximally clear in longer complex sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people argue that the government should give every unemployed person a mobile phone and should make sure they have access to the Internet. They believe this is the best way of using public money to reduce the problem of unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.