When a new town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time in.To what extent do agree or disagree?
Sample Response
When planning a new town, the authorities have various factors to consider and need to prioritize the construction of different facilities. To encourage active lifestyles, in my opinion, it is more important to build public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers.than shopping centers
Providing sports facilities is an effective way to improve city dwellers' health and thus reduce the government's budget for medical expenses in the long term. TodayIn this day and age, many people leadlive a sedentary lifestyle, choosing to watch TV or play video games after work and sitting in front of a screencollapsing in front of the screen every evening. With easy access to various kinds of sport facilities they are more likely to make exercise a regular part of their lives
AThe park is also a good place for exercise, particularly forto those who are not interested in competitive sports. Jogging, dancing and practicing Tai Chi in the park are quite common among older citizenselderly citizens these days. In a park with abundant greeneryIn a park with high greening rate, plants and trees can absorb air pollutantswaste gases and provide shadegreen shade, creating a comfortable environment for city dwellers. Those who spend leisure time in the park can connect closely with naturehave close contact with nature and feel refreshed.make themselves refreshed
By contrast, the main function of shopping centers is to enable people to buyis for people to buy various goods, but in today's world where onlineon-line shopping is becoming increasingly prevalent, the role of physical stores seems to be diminishing. Largeseems to be weakened Large shopping centers can also include leisure facilitiessome leisure facilities such as cafés and cinemas, but these are not as important as parks and sports centers.parks and sports centers
To conclude, in the process of urban planning and construction, building parks and sports facilities should be emphasized, in comparison to develop ing.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response maintains a clear preference for parks and sports facilities and develops several relevant benefits, especially public health, access to nature, and the declining importance of physical shopping. The main limitation is uneven language control, culminating in an incomplete final sentence that weakens the finish. Priority should go to proofreading sentence boundaries and grammatical endings while sharpening the comparison with shopping centres.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the comparison directly, presents a clear position, and develops relevant reasons for prioritising recreational facilities.
Make the comparative case more rigorous by explaining why the identified benefits outweigh the social or leisure value of shopping centres.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a logical paragraph sequence, and the contrast paragraph connects clearly to the stated position.
Use complete sentence boundaries and ensure the conclusion closes the argument cleanly rather than ending with a broken phrase.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficiently varied for the topic, but several collocations are awkward, including "high greening rate" and "make themselves refreshed."
Choose more natural collocations, such as "abundant greenery" and "feel refreshed," and check word forms carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a mix of complex and simple structures, although recurring article, preposition, punctuation, and word-form errors reduce control.
Proofread for missing punctuation and repair constructions such as "particularly to" and the incomplete phrase "in comparison to develop ing."
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IELTS Writing Task 2
When a new town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time in.To what extent do agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.