In the recent years, there has been an increase in the number of people killed on the road. Traffic designers blame drivers for driving too fast and drivers say the roads are bad. Who is to be blamed for the accidents deaths caused on roads?
Sample Response
It is a fact thatIs it a fact that the death rate due to traffic accidents has increased significantly in recent yearssignificantly in the past recent years. Authorities believe that this increase was due to poor drivingit was due to the bad driving by driversof the drivers, while motoristsvehicle drivers think that it was because of the poor condition of the roadsroad. I personally believe that we should not blame each other for these unsafe conditionsthe inconvenient condition, as each party should evaluate its actions and try to improveeach party should evaluate and try to improve themselves. On the one hand, street designers and government authorities believe that the rising numberthe incremental rate of traffic fatal accidentsaccidents that caused death is because of drivers' unsafe behaviourthe driver’s negative behaviours. Many drivers are doing undisciplined actssome in-disciplined act before or when they drive. For example, many drivers drink excessive amounts of alcoholare drinking alcohol at an unacceptable volume before they drive, or some people drive their cars above the speed limitare speeding their car over the standard limit. As a result, serious traffic accidents have risen drastically in recent yearsdrastically in the past recent years. On the other hand, car drivers believe that the high number of fatal traffic accidents iswas due to the terrible conditions of the road. They believe that many roads and streets are not well maintained, as there are potholes in the streetsholes on the street and many of the roads are bumpy and slippery. As a consequence, many motor vehicles drivers face serious accidents because of these road conditionsdue to the condition. In my opinion, instead of blaming someone or something, each party should evaluate themselves and try to resolve the issue. Traffic designers and the government could try to reduce traffic accidents by running a more intensive road-safety campaigngiving a more intense campaign about safety driving to the public, and setting stricter driving regulationsand set a stricter regulation about driving a car. Authorities should also try to improve their performance on road maintenance as well. As for drivers, they should try to follow all the set regulations about safety driving as these policies are designed with great care and precise assessmentmade with extra cautious and precise measurement.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay considers both driver behaviour and road conditions, supports each cause with relevant examples, and reaches a reasonable position that responsibility and corrective action should be shared. Its strongest feature is the balanced causal response. The main weakness is language control and presentation: one-block organisation and frequent unnatural expressions and grammatical errors reduce authority; create focused paragraphs and revise transport collocations, agreement, tense, and parallel structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly evaluates both sources of blame, provides relevant examples, and clearly argues for shared responsibility supported by practical actions.
State the shared-responsibility judgment more precisely and explain how enforcement and road maintenance would each reduce fatalities.
Coherence and Cohesion
The two causes and proposed solutions follow a clear logical sequence, but the single-paragraph presentation and repeated position statement limit organisation.
Use separate introduction, driver-cause, road-cause, and shared-solution paragraphs, ending with a brief conclusion rather than repeating the thesis mid-essay.
Lexical Resource
The response has sufficient road-safety vocabulary, but many inaccurate collocations and word forms make the argument sound unnatural.
Use standard phrases such as reckless behaviour, drink-driving, exceed the speed limit, road users, road-safety campaign, and enforce stricter regulations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Meaning remains clear overall, but frequent errors in sentence form, tense, agreement, articles, plurals, and parallel construction limit accuracy.
Rewrite the opening as a complete statement, keep past and present claims consistent, and match coordinated verbs after modal structures.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In the recent years, there has been an increase in the number of people killed on the road. Traffic designers blame drivers for driving too fast and drivers say the roads are bad. Who is to be blamed for the accidents deaths caused on roads?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.