The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Sample Response
The provided table illustrates the consumer expense's proportion of three different categories in five European countries in 2002. In general, food, drinks and tobacco had the highest proportion of total expenditures, followed by garment items. And the consumers were less likely toward the educational and entertaining expenses. In food and drink expense, Turkey and Ireland were well above than other countries, representing 32 per cent and 29 per cent respectively, whereas Italy, Spain and Sweden saw below 20 per cent. By contrast, the gap among the countries spending on clothes and footwear was narrowed. The people in most of the countries would estimate 5 to 6 percent budget on this category. Except for Italy, where has been famous in fashion for centuries, the people would like to spend as high as 9 percent on their fashion. In leisure and education expense, Turkey remained the highest proportion with 4 percent while other countries were merely between 2 to 3 percent. Spain even saw the lowest proportion to hit below 2 per cent. To sum up, the European consumers had similar spending habits when food and drinks remained the top, garment items were the second, and education and entertainments came to the last. In more details, Turkish consumers were more willing to pay for food and entertainment than others when Italian consumers would spend the most in fashion.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix noun phrase Original: consumer expense's proportion Suggested revision: proportions of consumer expenditure Why it matters: The possessive form is incorrect and the table presents several proportions.
- 2. Match table scope Original: five European countries Suggested revision: five countries Why it matters: The table labels them simply as five countries, so this avoids adding a geographic classification.
- 3. Use category label Original: followed by garment items Suggested revision: followed by clothing and footwear Why it matters: The table’s second category includes both clothing and footwear.
- 4. Improve sentence link Original: And the consumers Suggested revision: Consumers Why it matters: Beginning this sentence with “And” creates an unnecessary and awkward link.
- 5. Describe expenditure Original: less likely toward Suggested revision: spent the least on Why it matters: The original phrase is unidiomatic and implies preference rather than recorded spending.
- 6. Use exact category Original: educational and entertaining expenses Suggested revision: leisure and education Why it matters: This replacement matches the category named in the table.
- 7. Fix category phrase Original: In food and drink expense Suggested revision: For food, drinks and tobacco Why it matters: The original phrase is unnatural and omits tobacco from the category.
- 8. Fix comparison form Original: well above than Suggested revision: well above Why it matters: “Above” is not followed by “than” in this construction.
- 9. Use clear subject Original: saw below 20 per cent Suggested revision: recorded figures below 20 per cent Why it matters: Countries do not “see” percentages in this reporting structure.
- 10. Describe static gap Original: narrowed Suggested revision: narrow Why it matters: The table shows a static comparison, not a gap becoming narrower over time.
- 11. Use spending verb Original: would estimate Suggested revision: allocated Why it matters: The table records expenditure rather than consumers’ estimates.
- 12. Fix range phrase Original: 5 to 6 percent budget Suggested revision: about 5.4% to 6.5% of their budgets Why it matters: The range needs “of,” and these endpoints accurately cover the three relevant figures.
Suggested Rewrites
- consumer expense's proportion proportions of consumer expenditure
- five European countries five countries
- followed by garment items followed by clothing and footwear
- And the consumers Consumers
- less likely toward spent the least on
- educational and entertaining expenses leisure and education
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response accurately identifies the category hierarchy and selects useful cross-country comparisons, with rounded figures that remain faithful to the table. Its main limitation is frequent awkward wording and some unnecessary speculation about Italian fashion, which makes otherwise clear comparisons less precise. The highest-priority improvement is to describe only the table's evidence using natural comparative language and exact category labels.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The main patterns and most significant country comparisons are accurately reported, although the comment about Italy's fashion history is unsupported by the table.
Keep the account strictly data-based and include exact figures where rounding obscures smaller differences.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a clear category-by-category progression, but some linking is mechanical and the conclusion largely repeats the overview.
Use distinct paragraphs for the overview and grouped details, and avoid restating the same hierarchy in a final summary.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary range is adequate for comparisons, but frequent unnatural collocations such as "saw below" and "came to the last" reduce precision.
Use conventional data-reporting phrases such as "accounted for," "was the lowest," and "spent the largest proportion on."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of simple and complex forms is attempted, but errors in articles, comparatives, clause structure, and prepositions occur repeatedly.
Practise accurate comparative constructions, replacing forms such as "well above than" with "well above" or "higher than."
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.