The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Same question Compare 3 different answers
Sample Response
The given table represents amount spent by consumers in five different countries on different categories of items in the year 2002. As is presented in chart people of Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and finally Turkey consumed specific amount on different items respectively as mentioned different items like food and tobacco whereas clothing and footwear and finally leisure and education.
Let’s analyse the data given table in detail. As is observed, Turkey consumed excessive amount on food and tobacco which constitutes the highest percentage of 32.14%.Whereas Ireland was the second top country which consumed significant high amount on food and tobacco (28.9%) while Italy, Spain and Sweden spent higher than 15% respectively. On the other hand, all countries consumed fewer amounts on clothing and footwear. As is observed, 9% was the highest amount consumed on clothes & footwear by Italy consumers whereas Ireland, Spain, Sweden and finally Turkey expenditures were less than 5%. Interestingly Turkey gave priority to leisure and education and spent significantly higher (4.35%) while at the same time Irish did not take interest in leisure and education and spent only 2.21%. In conclusion, Turkey gave priority to food and tobacco whereas Italy spent a substantial amount on clothing and footwear and lastly Turkish gave priority to education and leisure and spent 4.35%.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Add the article Original: represents amount spent Suggested revision: represents the amount spent Why it matters: The definite article is required before the specified amount shown in the table.
- 2. Add missing preposition Original: data given table Suggested revision: data in the table Why it matters: In is needed to show where the data appear.
- 3. Describe proportion accurately Original: consumed excessive amount Suggested revision: spent the largest proportion Why it matters: The table shows expenditure shares, and 32.14% is the largest food, drink and tobacco figure.
- 4. Fix sentence boundary Original: 32.14%.Whereas Suggested revision: 32.14%, whereas Why it matters: A comma and a space correctly connect the comparison within one sentence.
- 5. Use ranking phrase Original: second top country Suggested revision: country with the second-highest figure Why it matters: This is the standard way to describe Ireland's rank in this category.
- 6. Correct word forms Original: consumed significant high amount Suggested revision: spent a significantly high proportion Why it matters: The adverb modifies high, and proportion accurately describes a percentage.
- 7. Compare quantities correctly Original: higher Suggested revision: more Why it matters: More than, not higher than, directly modifies the percentage spent.
- 8. Remove false pairing Original: 15% respectively Suggested revision: 15% Why it matters: Respectively is unnecessary because no ordered set of matching values is provided.
- 9. Use proportion wording Original: fewer amounts Suggested revision: smaller proportions Why it matters: Smaller proportions is the appropriate expression for percentage shares.
- 10. Match category label Original: clothes & footwear Suggested revision: clothing and footwear Why it matters: This formal wording matches the table's category label.
- 11. Use nationality adjective Original: Italy Suggested revision: Italian Why it matters: Italian is the adjective required before consumers.
- 12. Use possessive form Original: Turkey expenditures Suggested revision: Turkey's expenditure figures Why it matters: The possessive form and plural head noun correctly refer to Turkey's listed percentages.
Suggested Rewrites
- represents amount spent represents the amount spent
- data given table data in the table
- consumed excessive amount spent the largest proportion
- 32.14%.Whereas 32.14%, whereas
- second top country country with the second-highest figure
- consumed significant high amount spent a significantly high proportion
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response identifies several category leaders and includes some accurate figures, especially for food, tobacco, clothing, and footwear. Its main weakness is data accuracy: it wrongly places four clothing figures below 5% and overlooks that Spain, not Ireland, spent least on leisure and education, while the overview remains unclear. Prioritise a concise overall comparison and verify each supporting figure before describing country rankings.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Some highest figures are reported accurately, but the response lacks a clear overview and contains major inaccuracies about clothing expenditure and the lowest leisure figure.
Summarise the dominant pattern across categories first, then verify every ranking and percentage against the table before adding details.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has a recognisable introduction, detail section, and conclusion, but progression is weakened by repetition, mechanical linking, and a sentence fragment beginning with "Whereas".
Organise details by category or overall spending pattern and connect comparisons within complete sentences instead of repeating stock phrases.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss spending and rankings, but frequent awkward collocations such as "consumed excessive amount" and "gave priority" reduce naturalness and precision.
Use accurate expenditure language such as "spent the highest proportion on" and vary comparison verbs without changing their meaning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex comparisons, but frequent errors with articles, plurals, agreement, punctuation, and sentence boundaries reduce control despite generally understandable meaning.
Prioritise complete sentence structures and systematically check articles and subject-verb agreement in every comparison.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.