The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Sample Response
The table data represents the amount spent by consumers in Ireland, Italy, Spain, Sweden and Turkey in three categories in the year 2002. As is presented in the table data, People of those countries spent more on foods and tobaccos than they did for dresses, education and entertainments. According to the given data, Turk people spent the highest percentage of foods and tobaccos amounting one-third of their total expenses on consumer products. Irish people spent more than 28% on this category while people of Italy, Spain and Sweden spent just over 15% for foods and tobaccos. For clothing and footwear, the people of these five countries spent around 5% to 9% of which Italian spent the highest percentage (9%).
Interestingly the expenditure in leisure activities and education was much less than the amount spent on food, tobacco and dresses. The highest amount spent on education and entertainment was done by Turkish people (4.35%) and the least amount spent by was in Spain (1.98%). No nation among the given five spent more than 5% in education and leisure activities according to the given data.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Report percentages Original: represents the amount spent Suggested revision: shows the percentages spent Why it matters: The visual reports percentages of national expenditure, not absolute amounts.
- 2. Use concise date Original: in the year 2002 Suggested revision: in 2002 Why it matters: The shorter time expression is more natural and precise.
- 3. Use direct phrasing Original: As is presented in the table data Suggested revision: As the table shows Why it matters: This avoids an awkward passive construction and repeated reference to data.
- 4. Use natural noun Original: People of those countries Suggested revision: Consumers in these countries Why it matters: This is the natural way to refer to the populations represented by expenditure data.
- 5. Use chart categories Original: for dresses, education and entertainments Suggested revision: on clothing and footwear or leisure and education Why it matters: The replacement uses the category names shown in the table.
- 6. Correct nationality term Original: Turk people Suggested revision: Turkish consumers Why it matters: 'Turk people' is not the appropriate nationality expression in this context.
- 7. Name category accurately Original: highest percentage of foods and tobaccos Suggested revision: highest share spent on food, drinks and tobacco Why it matters: The chart category includes drinks and uses singular uncountable nouns.
- 8. Add required preposition Original: amounting one-third Suggested revision: amounting to nearly one-third Why it matters: The verb 'amount' requires 'to', and 32.14% is approximately one-third.
- 9. Match measured total Original: their total expenses on consumer products Suggested revision: national consumer expenditure Why it matters: The percentages are shares of national consumer expenditure.
- 10. Use data-focused noun Original: people Suggested revision: consumers Why it matters: 'Consumers' is more precise when describing expenditure shares.
- 11. Correct category phrase Original: for foods and tobaccos Suggested revision: on food, drinks and tobacco Why it matters: Spending takes 'on', and this is the category label in the table.
- 12. Repair range sentence Original: around 5% to 9% of which Italian spent Suggested revision: between 5% and 9%, with Italy recording Why it matters: The replacement creates a grammatical range and correctly names the country.
Suggested Rewrites
- represents the amount spent shows the percentages spent
- in the year 2002 in 2002
- As is presented in the table data As the table shows
- People of those countries Consumers in these countries
- for dresses, education and entertainments on clothing and footwear or leisure and education
- Turk people Turkish consumers
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response selects the principal spending patterns well, including the dominance of food, drink and tobacco and the leading countries in each category, and it progresses clearly through the table. Its main limitation is imprecise wording and several awkward grammatical constructions, with Spain also grouped too loosely among countries spending just over 15%. Prioritise precise category language, exact comparisons, and cleaner sentence structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
A clear overview and relevant extrema cover the main features, although the treatment of Spain's food-related spending is imprecise.
Report Spain at 18.80% separately rather than grouping it with Italy and Sweden as just over 15%.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from the overview through the three categories, with clear referencing and generally effective cohesion.
Separate the introduction and overview from the detailed comparisons to make the report structure even clearer.
Lexical Resource
The response has sufficient vocabulary for comparison, but recurring choices such as foods, tobaccos, dresses, and Turk people reduce precision.
Use the table's exact category terms and natural nationality forms, including Turkish people and clothing and footwear.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms communicates the comparisons, though agreement, articles, prepositions, and several malformed clauses recur.
Proofread comparative sentences for complete clause structure and correct forms, especially the least amount spent was in Spain.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.