The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Sample Response
The supplied table lists the percentages of national consumer spending in several countries in 2002. The expenditure was sorted into different categories.
In general, food/drinks/tobacco were true as the vast majority of consumer expenditure in all observed countries followed by clothing/footwear and leisure/education which came up in the second and third place respectively.
Looking at the details, Turkey, Spain, and Ireland accounted the high majority of national expenditure for meals, beverage and tobacco, 32.14%, 28.91%, and 18.80%, respectively. On the other hand, Italy and Sweden were lower than other countries, only about 16%.
Meanwhile, Turkey also came up roughly in big numbers of national expenditure for clothing/footwear and leisure /education, 6.63% and 4.35%, in sequence, although Italy amassed the highest expenditure for clothing, 9.00%. In contrast, Sweden was true as the lowest national spent on the same category, only 5.40%. Yet, due to leisure/education, Sweden reckoned as one of the high national expenditures, 3.22%, following Turkey which was the highest figure, 4.35%. However, Spain halved the figure roughly and was true as the lowest national expenditure, 1.98%.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. State exact scope Original: several Suggested revision: five Why it matters: The table covers exactly five countries.
- 2. Describe table grouping Original: The expenditure was sorted Suggested revision: The spending data were divided Why it matters: Data are divided into categories rather than expenditure being sorted.
- 3. State category count Original: different Suggested revision: three Why it matters: The visual contains three clearly defined spending categories.
- 4. Use precise data language Original: came up roughly in big numbers of national expenditure Suggested revision: also recorded relatively high proportions of national expenditure Why it matters: The original phrase is not a natural way to describe percentages.
- 5. Remove stray space Original: leisure /education Suggested revision: leisure/education Why it matters: The spacing around the slash should be consistent with the category label.
- 6. Use comparison term Original: in sequence Suggested revision: respectively Why it matters: “Respectively” correctly links the two figures to the two categories in order.
- 7. Use precise reporting verb Original: amassed the highest expenditure for clothing Suggested revision: recorded the highest proportion for clothing and footwear Why it matters: The table presents proportions, and “recorded” is the appropriate reporting verb.
- 8. Repair clause structure Original: Sweden was true as the lowest national spent Suggested revision: Sweden recorded the lowest proportion of national spending Why it matters: The original clause uses an incorrect predicate and noun form.
- 9. Fix category preposition Original: on Suggested revision: in Why it matters: Use “in” when locating a figure within a category.
- 10. Fix category connector Original: due to leisure/education Suggested revision: for leisure and education Why it matters: “Due to” expresses cause and cannot introduce the spending category here.
- 11. Repair comparison wording Original: Sweden reckoned as one of the high national expenditures Suggested revision: Sweden recorded one of the higher spending shares Why it matters: The country recorded a share; it was not itself an expenditure.
- 12. Clarify comparison reference Original: following Turkey which was the highest figure Suggested revision: behind Turkey, which had the highest figure Why it matters: The revision clearly distinguishes the country from its figure and marks the relative ranking.
Suggested Rewrites
- several five
- The expenditure was sorted The spending data were divided
- different three
- came up roughly in big numbers of national expenditure also recorded relatively high proportions of national expenditure
- leisure /education leisure/education
- in sequence respectively
Why this response received Band 6.5
The report has a clear overview of the category ranking and an effective paragraph structure, and it correctly identifies most high and low values. Its main factual weakness is that Ireland's and Spain's food, drink and tobacco figures are reversed, while frequent unnatural collocations reduce precision; the highest-priority improvement is to check country-value pairings carefully and describe them with straightforward statistical language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The overview correctly ranks the three spending categories and most extremes are accurate, but the response incorrectly assigns 28.91% to Spain and 18.80% to Ireland.
Verify every country-value pairing against the table, especially reporting Ireland at 28.91% and Spain at 18.80% for food, drink and tobacco.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction, overview, and category-focused detail paragraphs create clear progression, although some connectors and comparisons are mechanically or awkwardly linked.
Keep the current paragraph structure but use simpler links that explicitly signal each category and its highest and lowest countries.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a broad statistical vocabulary, but frequent miscollocations such as "were true as," "amassed," and "national spent" weaken accuracy and naturalness.
Use reliable phrases such as "accounted for," "recorded the highest proportion," and "had the lowest spending share."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms is attempted and meaning remains generally clear, but article, agreement, preposition, and clause errors recur across the report.
Prioritise accurate subject-verb agreement and percentage structures, for example "food, drinks and tobacco accounted for the largest share" and "Turkey recorded 32.14%."
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002. Percentage of national consumer expenditure by category - 2002
Your response
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