You are organising an executive event for the company you work for. Write a letter to the person in charge of a venue that you are considering for the event. In your letter: - ask about available dates - ask what services the venue provides - ask about the costs
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to inform you that we are considering your banquet hall for our annual dinner party that we are planning to organise at the end of October 2025. Therefore, I would like to obtain some information to finalise the process of reserving this venue. First of all, please notify me of the availability of the venue as per our schedule. Can we avail of it on the evening of 28th or 29th October? I would also like to know about the service you offer including the dinner menu, power backup and decoration. As it is a prestigious event for our company, you should follow some decent theme for the decoration and provide a buffet menu. My recommendation is to use a professional interior decorator and use white flowers and colourful balloons for the decoration. Finally, please forward me the estimated expenses that will incur to hire the venue and avail the services. Send it to my email address - [email address]. Previous experience with your company was outstanding but this time, I am expecting more innovative design and high quality of services. Yours faithfully, Fahad Sultan
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use concise wording Original: finalise the process of reserving this venue Suggested revision: finalise the booking Why it matters: This concise collocation states the purpose more naturally.
- 2. Correct the collocation Original: avail of it Suggested revision: book it Why it matters: A customer books a venue rather than availing of it.
- 3. Use plural services Original: service Suggested revision: services Why it matters: The following list refers to several distinct services.
- 4. Choose precise wording Original: some decent theme Suggested revision: an appropriate theme Why it matters: This phrase is more precise and suitably formal for a business enquiry.
- 5. Soften the request Original: you should follow Suggested revision: could you arrange Why it matters: A polite request is more suitable than directing the venue staff.
- 6. Fix verb structure Original: expenses that will incur Suggested revision: costs we will incur Why it matters: Expenses do not incur themselves; a person or organisation incurs them.
- 7. Correct verb choice Original: avail Suggested revision: use Why it matters: Use is the natural verb with services in this context.
- 8. Use a polite request Original: Send it to my email address Suggested revision: Please send it to my email address Why it matters: Adding please maintains an appropriately courteous business tone.
- 9. Sentence rewrite Original: Previous experience with your company was outstanding but this time, I am expecting more innovative design and high quality of services. Suggested revision: Our previous experience with your company was outstanding, and this time we are expecting more innovative decorations and high-quality service. Why it matters: The rewrite supplies the missing determiner and corrects coordination, word form, and collocation.
- 10. Organise the requests Suggested revision: Divide the letter into short paragraphs for the purpose, date enquiry, service requirements, costs, and closing. Why it matters: The single block makes the three requested areas harder to scan.
Suggested Rewrites
- finalise the process of reserving this venue finalise the booking
- avail of it book it
- service services
- some decent theme an appropriate theme
- you should follow could you arrange
- expenses that will incur costs we will incur
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response’s strongest feature is complete task coverage: it asks about two dates, relevant services and estimated costs while giving useful context for the event. Its main limitation is register and precision, as several requests become directives and some collocations are unnatural, while the single-block format reduces readability. Prioritise courteous question forms, concise specifications and separate paragraphs for availability, services and pricing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The letter clearly covers dates, services and costs and explains the event, but the directive wording about decoration is less appropriate for an initial formal enquiry.
Turn the design preferences into polite questions or requests and ask whether the quoted cost includes catering, decoration and power backup.
Coherence and Cohesion
The content follows a sensible sequence from dates to services and costs, but presenting the whole letter as one paragraph weakens the separation of its three enquiries.
Use one short paragraph for each required area and place the previous-experience comment with the closing request.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for a venue enquiry, but phrases such as “avail of it,” “decent theme,” “forward me the expenses” and “high quality of services” are awkward.
Use natural formal phrases such as “book the venue,” “suitable theme,” “send me an estimate” and “high-quality service.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence forms keeps the message clear, although article, agreement, relative-clause and verb-pattern errors recur in several requests.
Revise forms such as “the services you offer,” “expenses that we will incur,” and “My previous experience was outstanding.”
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are organising an executive event for the company you work for. Write a letter to the person in charge of a venue that you are considering for the event. In your letter:
- ask about available dates
- ask what services the venue provides
- ask about the costs
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.