You are looking for a part-time job. Write a letter to an employment agency. In your letter: - introduce yourself - explain what sort of job you would like - say what experience and skills you have
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to express my interest in registeringinterest to get registered with your employment agency as I am looking for a suitable part-time job. I hope you willI am hoping you would add me to your databaseenlist me in your database and notify me of suitable vacanciessuitable job announcements and forward my resume to prospective employers. My name is Hansen LeeI am Hansen Lee, an international student at the University of Westminster and my major is Business Administration. I am originally from Japan and will be staying in London for the next couple of years. To cover my educational expensessupport my education cost and to gain some workjob experience, I am seeking a suitable part-time position. I can work as an administrative assistant, customer experience manager or a salespersonor as a salesperson in a retail shop. I am availableI can spare time after 4.30 pmfrom 4.30 pm onwards on weekdays and throughout the weekendsfull-time on weekends. I have previously worked as a customer support officer in a call centre in Japan and as a sales executive in a superstore in London. I have attached my curriculum vitaeCurriculum Vitae towith this letter for your kind consideration, which further detailsconsideration which further details my education and work experience. I look forward to hearing from you and learning about the registration processgetting the details process to register with your employmentjob agency. Thank you in advance. Yours faithfully, Hansen Lee
Why this response received Band 6.5
The letter presents the applicant’s background, availability, preferred roles, and relevant work history in a clear professional context. Its main limitation is that the requested skills are not actually identified, while the unbroken paragraph and several awkward expressions reduce polish. Prioritise naming transferable skills supported by the stated experience—such as customer communication, administration, or sales—and organise the three bullet points into distinct paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The purpose, personal background, preferred roles, and experience are clear, but the required account of relevant skills is missing.
Explicitly identify two or three skills gained from the call-centre and retail roles and link them to the positions requested.
Coherence and Cohesion
The ideas progress logically through introduction, preferences, availability, and experience, but the entire letter is presented as one unbroken paragraph.
Use separate paragraphs for personal introduction, desired work and availability, and experience and skills before the closing request.
Lexical Resource
The response has adequate employment-related vocabulary, but several phrases are unnatural, including ‘enlist me in your database’, ‘education cost’, and ‘details process’.
Use standard expressions such as ‘register with your agency’, ‘support my studies’, ‘available from 4:30 p.m.’, and ‘registration process’.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Most sentences are clear and a mix of structures is used, although verb patterns, articles, coordination, and relative-clause control are occasionally faulty.
Correct patterns such as ‘interest in registering’, clarify the relative clause about the CV, and revise the final request into a complete natural construction.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are looking for a part-time job. Write a letter to an employment agency. In your letter:
- introduce yourself
- explain what sort of job you would like
- say what experience and skills you have
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.