Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Sample Response
In recent years, there has been an increasing trend ofThere exists an increasing trend in recent years that more people are turning to alternative medicines and treatments rather than consultingconsulting with their usual doctor when having health problems. In my opinion, despite a few possible benefitsfew possible benefits, this development brings about a lot more drawbackssetbacks that will do great harm to both patients and the whole society.
The argument in favor of such a trendsuch trend is that the chance to survive for patients may increase as the choices of medical care methods increase. Compared with conventional doctors whousual doctors that have received limited training and don't have much knowledge about the latest development of medicine, alternative medicines and treatments derived from other medicine fields or the newest scientific researchresearches may provide unexpected improvements to patients' health. For example, people suffering from tumourstumor tend to take a gamblethrow a dice by choosing ancient medicine theories or treatments still under trialtests when no existent scientifically proved methods can help them survive. In this way, it seems reasonable to consider alternative medicines and treatments as a help to curing fatal diseases.
However, this approach results in several harmfulharming outcomes to patients and the society, outweighing the minor benefits it cannot ensure. For patients, their usual doctors are the only expertsexpertise about their conditions in most cases, and believing in methods that they disapprove is absolutely a risky move. The current situation may be depressing, the prospect may be bleak, but it doesn't mean that it is a wise move for patients to gamble their lives for a seemingly promising future using measures that probably come from unqualified practitionerswizards' minds or don't suit their particular conditionstatus at all. In fact, people with terminal diseases who are most desperate for trying new alternatives have a much lower chance of survivalreceive quite lower survival chance than continuing with original treatments.
Moreover, as the trend grows popular, the trust relationship between patients and doctors will gradually collapse, thereby affecting the medical care for the whole society. As the number of patients who have little professional knowledge refuse to take doctors' prescriptions rise, more ordinary people will be affected by this trend believe less in doctors' suggestions, even if they are always right. What's worse, fraudulent advertisingfake advertisement will make use of this general skepticism, trying to promote their fake but well publicized products to more people, and gradually replacing the hospital's role in medical care. Do we really want to live in a society that people take fake pills instead of professional people's help to cure diseases?
In conclusion, people's distrust of usual doctorsdistrust usual doctors and turning to alternative medicines and treatments is a harmful development that risks both patients' lives and the medical trust of the society for a negligible amount of luck.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay presents a clear and well-developed stance on the issue, supporting arguments with logical reasoning and relevant extension. Its main limitation lies in occasional linguistic inaccuracies and overly dramatic phrasing that slightly detract from an academic tone. To improve, refine word choices for better precision and ensure stylistic tone remains objective throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response fully addresses the prompt with a clear position throughout, acknowledging minor benefits before thoroughly developing the negative impacts.
Focus on maintaining a balanced, measured academic tone rather than relying on hyperbole to strengthen points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is logical and ideas progress smoothly across the essay using clear topic sentences and cohesive links.
Vary transitions between paragraphs to avoid repetitive structures when introducing opposing arguments.
Lexical Resource
A broad vocabulary is used flexibly to discuss medical trends, though occasional minor word choice errors occur.
Replace slightly inaccurate word forms and informal expressions with precise academic vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good variety of complex structures is demonstrated with high overall clarity, despite occasional minor grammatical slips.
Proofread subject-verb agreement and article usage to increase error-free sentence frequency.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.