Some people warn that the era of the silver screen is coming to an end and that people will eventually lose interest in going to the cinema. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Sample Response
In the 21st century, cinemas have become ubiquitous. However, being widespread movie theatres aren't able to lure people to spend their leisure time. It is agreed that gradually the number of people turningturn up at theatres is going to decrease in view of current trends. It is due to ticket prices that have skyrocketed over the last few years along with the advent of online movie rentals and downloadsdownload. Firstly, the cost of tickets has surged in the last decade. For example, we are spending almost ten times as muchit is almost 10 times more that we are spending compared to the 1990s1990's. Unfortunately, this is a negative trend that is difficult to reversesomething that has a negative impact which is difficult to encounter despite advanced technologythe advanced technology, better seatingsitting and ease of booking. Thus, it makes it clear why the future of the big screenthe future of big screen is bleak. Secondly, the introduction of online movie libraries for rentals as well as downloads at affordable prices. For instance, iTunes and Netflix have entered this marketjumped into this area to offer customers affordableeconomical options to buy or rent movies. It’s more appealing to stay in and watch something on a computer screen or tablet with no physical constraints. Therefore, it’s hard to imagine people choosing to gohard to imagine for people to show up at cinemas. The environment of cinema hallsthe cinema halls and the quality of movies are also concernsare also in question. Very few families nowadays go to the cinemago to cinema while this was commona common trend even in the late 1990sin later 90’s. To summarise, it is expensive ticketsthe expensive tickets as well as the movie watching options on the internet that have led to the decline in cinema attendancethe decline of people visiting cinemas to spend their free time. Thus, it is clear why the number of people going to watch a filmflick will eventually decrease further in years to come.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay maintains a clear agreement with the prediction and supports it through two relevant drivers: rising ticket prices and convenient online alternatives. Its main limitation is the dense, single-paragraph presentation, compounded by several sentence fragments and awkward expressions that interrupt otherwise logical development. The highest-priority improvement is to separate the reasons into focused paragraphs and ensure that every example is expressed in a complete, precise sentence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained and the main reasons are relevant and supported with examples, though points about cinema environment and film quality remain undeveloped.
Either develop the environment and quality point with a causal explanation or omit it and deepen the two central reasons.
Coherence and Cohesion
The reasoning follows a recognisable sequence from price to online access and conclusion, but the absence of paragraphing and some mechanical links reduce clarity.
Use separate body paragraphs for ticket costs and home-viewing convenience, each with a clear topic sentence and supporting example.
Lexical Resource
The response has adequate range for discussing entertainment trends, but collocations such as “encounter a negative impact,” “better sitting,” and “later 90’s” are inaccurate.
Use natural expressions such as offset the impact, improved seating, cinema attendance, and the late 1990s.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex structures are attempted, but fragments, relative-clause errors, and faulty infinitive constructions occur frequently.
Turn fragments such as “Secondly, the introduction...” into complete clauses and check structures after “imagine,” “cause,” and comparative phrases.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people warn that the era of the silver screen is coming to an end and that people will eventually lose interest in going to the cinema. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.