Fashion trends are difficult to follow these days and it’s widely believed that they primarily exist just to sell clothes. Some people believe that we shouldn’t follow them and that we should dress in what we like and feel comfortable in. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?.
Sample Response
It’s widely believed in today’s materialistic world that the latest innovative fashion trends hold great significance. On the other hand, such trends are believed to be set only in the pursuit of profits for large designer companies. It seems that in recent times, people are now changing their minds in regards to wearing clothes for comfort and as a personal choice. Personally I agree that we should pay more attention to individuality and comfort in the way we dress. Firstly, fashion designs exist as a form of creative artistic expression of the designer. Although this may be true, undoubtedly such designs take away individuality once a trend is set in place. By this I mean that there is nothing unique about wearing what everybody else does. More specifically, if everyone sports the latest colour and design in summer skirts, do we not look the same? Secondly, It is possible that fashion trends can look extremely stylish to the general public. However, it can be argued that the main purpose of wearing clothes is for more functional reasons. This is primarily due to the fact that clothes were traditionally worn to protect people from climatic conditions. For instance, clothes are still worn basically to keep people warm and dry in winter and cool in summer. Finally, fashion certainly gives us a sense of confidence and pride in our appearance. While this is certainly a good point, it also means that following such changeable trends proves to be expensive. For example, purchasing every latest season’s fashion item will of course blow the budget of many young people. In conclusion, there are various arguments to support the dismissal of fashion trends, consisting of not conforming, comfort and price, which I strongly agree with.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove redundant wording Original: latest innovative fashion trends Suggested revision: latest fashion trends Why it matters: Latest and innovative overlap here, so one clear modifier is sufficient.
- 2. Use precise wording Original: hold great significance Suggested revision: are highly influential Why it matters: The revision states the effect of fashion trends more precisely.
- 3. Improve profit collocation Original: set only in the pursuit of profits Suggested revision: created solely to generate profits Why it matters: Generate profits is the natural collocation for the intended commercial purpose.
- 4. Use natural noun phrase Original: designer Suggested revision: fashion Why it matters: Fashion companies is a more natural term for businesses that sell designer clothing.
- 5. Remove repeated time marker Original: in recent times, people are now Suggested revision: people are now Why it matters: In recent times and now repeat the same temporal meaning.
- 6. Correct fixed expression Original: in regards to Suggested revision: with regard to Why it matters: With regard to is the standard fixed expression in formal English.
- 7. Add introductory comma Original: Personally I agree Suggested revision: Personally, I agree Why it matters: A comma should follow the introductory adverb.
- 8. Use formal phrasing Original: take away individuality Suggested revision: reduce individuality Why it matters: Reduce expresses the loss of individuality more concisely in an academic argument.
- 9. Choose precise verb Original: set in place Suggested revision: established Why it matters: Established is a more concise verb for a trend becoming widely followed.
- 10. Fix number and preposition Original: latest colour and design in summer skirts Suggested revision: latest colours and designs for summer skirts Why it matters: The general reference requires plural nouns, and for correctly expresses their association with the garments.
- 11. Fix mid-sentence capital Original: It Suggested revision: it Why it matters: The pronoun should not be capitalised after the introductory adverb and comma.
- 12. Use natural term Original: climatic Suggested revision: weather Why it matters: Weather conditions is the natural phrase for the heat, cold, and rain described here.
Suggested Rewrites
- latest innovative fashion trends latest fashion trends
- hold great significance are highly influential
- set only in the pursuit of profits created solely to generate profits
- designer fashion
- in recent times, people are now people are now
- in regards to with regard to
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response presents a clear, consistent position and develops three relevant reasons with appropriate examples, while its paragraph-by-paragraph rebuttal structure keeps the argument easy to follow. The main limitation is occasional awkward or overstated wording, so the highest-priority improvement is to refine collocations and express each supporting point more precisely and naturally for the reader.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response directly answers the question with a consistent opinion supported by developed points about individuality, practicality, and cost.
Strengthen the argument further by linking each reason more explicitly to the claim that fashion trends mainly serve commercial interests.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a clear sequence, and the repeated concession-and-rebuttal pattern gives each main point a coherent internal structure.
Vary the mechanical numbered transitions and make the relationship between the introductory claims and the main reasons more direct.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a sufficiently wide range of topic vocabulary, though several combinations are awkward or unnecessarily emphatic.
Refine collocations such as references to seasonal purchases and designer expression so that they sound more idiomatic and exact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentences are frequent and generally well controlled, with only occasional punctuation, capitalisation, and attachment problems.
Review sentence openings and concluding relative clauses to remove small errors and clarify exactly what each modifier refers to.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Fashion trends are difficult to follow these days and it’s widely believed that they primarily exist just to sell clothes. Some people believe that we shouldn’t follow them and that we should dress in what we like and feel comfortable in. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.