In modern cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbor and never feel a sense of community. What are the causes of this situation? How can we change it?
Sample Response
Nowadays, many urban residentscity people do not know their neighbours and lack a sense of communityclose community feeling. This is very common in daily life. People often stay at home alone and seldom talk with their neighbours. This essay will explain the reasons and viablesimple solutions. There are some main reasons for this problem. First, mobile phones and the internet are very popular. Many people spend a considerable amount of timelots of time chatting online or watching short videos. They focus on virtual life and have little time to communicate with neighbours. Long-term exposure to virtual communication also impairsimpair people’s abilities to interact face-to-faceto face-to-face interactions since people cannot distinguish others'other’s emotions through subtle facial expressions and body languagelanguages. Second, in modern society characterized by increasingly severe competitionincreasing severe competitions, workers face great work pressure and the risk of unemployment. They have to spend large amounts of time on work and generate more profit forcontribute more profits to enterprises. They feel tired after work and have no energy to talk with neighbours. Some useful methods can improve this situation. First, communities can hold weekend activities to help neighbours meet and talk with each other. This helps people become better acquaintedget familiar easily. Second, companies can reduce working hoursshorten working time for employees. With more spare time after work, workers can have more chances to communicate with their neighbours. Third, people should not use phones too often. They can greet neighbours when they meet. Active communication can make neighbourhood relationships warmer. In conclusion, overuse of mobile phones and heavy work pressure make neighbours unfamiliar with each other. This problem can be solved easily. With the effortsWith efforts of communities and individuals, we can build a warmer and more harmonious living environment.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt with relevant causes and practical solutions, demonstrating logical organization throughout. Its main limitation lies in occasional grammatical inaccuracies and awkward word choices that slightly disrupt the flow. To raise the essay's quality, focus on refining precise vocabulary usage and checking noun countability and adjective forms.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both prompt questions are answered fully with relevant causes and feasible solutions developed across clear paragraphs.
Provide more detailed real-world examples to further extend and illustrate the proposed solutions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is logically organized with clear paragraphing and clear progression from causes to solutions.
Incorporate a wider variety of cohesive devices to link ideas more smoothly between sentences.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-specific vocabulary is used accurately, though minor collocations and word forms are occasionally imprecise.
Focus on precise word choices and natural collocations, such as avoiding plural forms for uncountable nouns like 'body language'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A variety of complex structure types is attempted with a high level of grammatical control and clear overall meaning.
Proofread for minor grammatical details, such as modifier forms before nouns and correct prepositional pairings.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In modern cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbor and never feel a sense of community. What are the causes of this situation? How can we change it?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.