In modern cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbor and never feel a sense of community. What are the causes of this situation? How can we change it?

Same questionCompare 6 different answers (Band 6.5–7)

Sample Response

1

In an era when a growing proportion of the populationproportion of population lives in urban regions, the phenomenon that residents tend to be unfamiliar with their neighbors and lack a sense of community and belonging has sparked an intense debate. From my perspective, the prevalence of the Internet and urbanization trends may contribute to this phenomenon. In order to address it, the government should take immediate and effective measures. To begin with, there is no denying that the popularity of the Internet and portable digital devices, including mobile phones, tablets and laptops, weakens relationships among neighborsestranges the relationships between neighbors. With theirits convenience and efficiency in communication, individuals get accustomed to utilizing mobile phones to interact with their friends or families, which can transcend geographical and temporal barriers. However, online chatting characterized by insufficient face-to-face communication may impair people’s capabilities to distinguish others’ emotions through subtle facial expressions and body languagegestures. Therefore, when people want to socialize with their neighbors, they tend to ignore their genuine feelings. Besides, digital indulgence means that netizens are immersed in the virtual world and activities such as scrolling through short videos, playing games and chatting with strangers, reducing their free time for offline communication with neighbors. More importantly, due to the configuration of modern cities and the structure of buildingsstructure of buildings, it is difficult for citizens to become acquainted with their neighbors. Undoubtedly, compared to the past when dwellers inhabited bungalowsinhabited in bungalows with large public spaces, contemporary cities are packed with apartments and skyscrapers where people's privacypeople’ privacy is being strengthened at the expense of public areas for social interaction to promote interpersonal relationships. To begin with,First and foremost, the government can allocate more funds towards the construction of community centers with more amenities, which can enable neighbors to engage in communal activities and make acquaintances with each other. Furthermore, it is advisable for the local authority to enact some policies or regulations to incentivize face-to-face interactionsthe face-to-face interactions. For instance, residentspersons who develop a sound relationship with their neighbors can be rewarded with a reasonable sum of subsidies to stimulate other people’s motivation.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 7.0

The response effectively addresses both parts of the prompt by analyzing clear causes of urban isolation and offering relevant solutions. Main ideas are supported well, though some suggestions lack practical feasibility. To achieve a higher score, refine the realism of proposed solutions and eliminate minor grammatical and phrasing inaccuracies.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The essay thoroughly addresses both the causes of urban detachment and potential solutions with well-developed supporting arguments.

Next step

Ensure proposed solutions are pragmatic and convincing rather than overly artificial, such as paying monetary subsidies for making friends.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.0
Scoring rule

Information is organized logically across distinct paragraphs with clear overall progression and appropriate linking words.

Next step

Vary cohesive devices slightly to prevent repetitive mechanical transitions at the start of paragraphs and sentences.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

A wide range of topic-specific vocabulary is used accurately to express subtle nuances.

Next step

Focus on precise word choices and natural collocations, avoiding slightly awkward phrases like 'inhabited in bungalows' or 'sound relationship'.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0
Scoring rule

A good variety of complex sentence structures is demonstrated with general grammatical accuracy throughout the text.

Next step

Pay closer attention to minor punctuation and possessive forms, such as correcting 'people' privacy' to 'people's privacy'.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

In modern cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbor and never feel a sense of community. What are the causes of this situation? How can we change it?

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