Nowadays food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live?
Sample Response
Advancement in the technology, such as microwave oven and rice cooker, has provided efficient options for cooking food. This has reduced the overall time required for cookery. Thus it is believed that this has enhanced the lifestyle of the human being to a greater extent. In this essay, we will analyse how these methods allow people to spend their spare time practising their hobbies and provide healthy food options for the young people.
To begin with, availability of new methodologies have minimised the cooking period making it possible for them to utilise this span for enjoying the skills of their interest. For instance, using rice cooker usually takes half the time when compared to the conventional gas cooking. This example clearly shows that the individuals who prefer this cooker will manage to get some extra idle time for them. Thus, it is obvious that this moment can be efficiently used for improving their expertise as well as for the relaxing purpose.
In addition, students can cook food for themselves with the aid of these advance innovations and hence, they can feed on the healthy home-made food. A good illustration for this is the utilisation of microwave by the bachelors who have to stay away from the family for study or work purpose. Usage of this microwave enables them to cook food quickly since very few steps are involved in microwave cooking and thereby, they do not need to depend on restaurants for food. As a consequence, the health condition of these young people is maintained since they will intake less amount of artificial food.
From the above examples, the benefits of easy methodologies for preparation of the culinary are difficult to debunk. It is thus hoped that more development will take place in regards to cooking which will ease the life of the masses in the foreseeable future.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use general plural Original: Advancement in the technology Suggested revision: Advances in technology Why it matters: The general development requires a plural count noun and no definite article.
- 2. Pluralise examples Original: such as microwave oven and rice cooker Suggested revision: such as microwave ovens and rice cookers Why it matters: General examples of appliance types should be plural.
- 3. Use cooking term Original: cookery Suggested revision: cooking Why it matters: Cooking names the activity, while cookery usually refers to the skill or subject.
- 4. Use concise claim Original: enhanced the lifestyle of the human being to a greater extent Suggested revision: greatly improved people's lives Why it matters: The replacement expresses the intended benefit clearly without inflated wording.
- 5. Remove unnecessary article Original: the young people Suggested revision: young people Why it matters: Young people is a general plural reference and does not take the definite article.
- 6. Fix agreement and wording Original: availability of new methodologies have minimised Suggested revision: availability of new methods has reduced Why it matters: Availability is singular and reduced is the natural verb for a shorter duration.
- 7. Use time collocation Original: period Suggested revision: time Why it matters: Cooking time is the established expression for the duration of food preparation.
- 8. Clarify leisure activity Original: for enjoying the skills of their interest Suggested revision: to pursue their interests Why it matters: The original phrase confuses skills with interests and uses an unnatural purpose construction.
- 9. Add the article Original: using rice cooker Suggested revision: using a rice cooker Why it matters: The singular countable appliance requires an article.
- 10. Use precise comparison Original: when compared to the conventional gas cooking Suggested revision: compared with conventional stove-top cooking Why it matters: The revised phrase identifies the cooking method naturally and removes unnecessary wording.
- 11. Use free-time phrase Original: extra idle time for them Suggested revision: extra free time Why it matters: Free time is the natural term, and for them is redundant in this sentence.
- 12. Use clear reference Original: moment Suggested revision: time Why it matters: Time refers clearly to the saved duration, whereas moment suggests a specific instant.
Suggested Rewrites
- Advancement in the technology Advances in technology
- such as microwave oven and rice cooker such as microwave ovens and rice cookers
- cookery cooking
- enhanced the lifestyle of the human being to a greater extent greatly improved people's lives
- the young people young people
- availability of new methodologies have minimised availability of new methods has reduced
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response gives a direct answer and develops two relevant benefits with clear examples, creating a straightforward and well-organised argument. Its main limitation is the repeated use of unnatural or imprecise wording, accompanied by recurring article, agreement and word-form errors, even though meaning remains clear. The highest priority is to replace forced academic expressions with natural collocations and check sentence-level grammar for accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear affirmative position is sustained and two relevant benefits are developed with explanations and concrete examples.
Make the health argument more precise by explaining why home cooking is likely to be healthier rather than broadly labelling restaurant food artificial.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically through a focused introduction, two distinct body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with generally clear linking.
Reduce formulaic signposting and strengthen internal cohesion by making references such as this time and these appliances more specific.
Lexical Resource
The response demonstrates a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, but frequent unnatural collocations and overformal choices limit precision.
Use natural expressions such as cooking methods, free time, kitchen appliances and eat less processed food instead of forced academic substitutions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of complex structures is used and meaning remains clear, though errors in articles, agreement, word forms and countability recur.
Proofread noun phrases and verb agreement carefully, particularly constructions such as the availability of methods has and advanced innovations.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.