The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?
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Sample Response
Many employees expect to gain a shorter week and a longer weekend. Personally, I totally agree that workers should be given more leisure time because it not only benefits individuals' health but also contributes to the sustainable development of the companies.
From the perspective of individual workers, their relaxationrelaxing time is constantly declining because of the increasingheavier stress of daily life and their employers' high demand for KPIs. With the economic situation worsening, workers need to work more overtimedo more overtime work to gain a sufficienthigh income in order to support their families. At the same time, bosses make higher profit targetsobjectives that are hard to achieve, leading to heavier workloads for their employees. For example, a growing number of IT corporations require extensive overtime, making their employees exhausted. It has negative effects on both workers' physical and mental health. Therefore, workers need more time to relax, develop their own hobbies, and be with their families.
From a business perspective, providing enough time for employees to rest is essential for long-term successtheir sustainable development. Many papers have revealed that working hoursthe working conditions could really make a difference to workers' passion and motivation for work, which is directly connected with companies' profits. Furthermore, a longer weekendFurthermore，a longer weekend could improve workers' satisfaction with their companies, making them more willing to work for their bosses. It means the staff turnover ratestaff turnover rate rate of the company would remainbe low, which is essential for the sustainable development of a company.
In conclusion, I fully agree with the demand of workers that they need more weekend time to rest. It not only helps improve workers' quality of life, but also maintains sustained successsustainable improvement of the companies.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The essay presents a clear, consistent position that fully answers the prompt using well-organized main points supported by relevant explanation and examples. Paragraphing and cohesive devices are logical throughout, while the vocabulary and grammatical structures demonstrate good range and control. To reach an even higher band, the writer should focus on extending arguments with more specific detail and refining minor word choice and typographical errors.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response clearly states a strong agreement with the prompt and logically supports it with arguments regarding individual well-being and corporate benefits.
Provide more explicit detail on how reduced working hours specifically increase workplace productivity to strengthen the main arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well-structured with clear topic sentences and a logical progression of ideas between and within paragraphs.
Proofread carefully to eliminate minor typing slips like repeated words that slightly disrupt the smooth flow of text.
Lexical Resource
A good variety of topic-specific vocabulary and flexible phrasings are used effectively to communicate complex ideas.
Incorporate more precise academic collocations while ensuring natural phrasing throughout the text.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide variety of simple and complex sentence structures are produced with a high level of accuracy and good control of punctuation.
Maintain consistent precision in complex clause structures to achieve complete grammatical error-freedom.