Some people say that in the digital age, theatres and cinemas are no longer important as people can watch all the entertainment they want online. Others argue that theatres and cinemas are still important both economically and culturally. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
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Sample Response
In an era when digital age has sparked an intense debate. Some people think theatres and cinemas will become ignoredingroged because they candue to they can find all kinds of entertainment on the Internet. Other people argue that theatres and cinemas still play important roles nowadays. I would explain these two views before I delineatedeclineate my own opinion.
On the one hand,On one hand, the shows or movies which are shown in theatresplay in the theatres and cinemas, we can watch themit from recording videos that people post on social mediasend to the social media. So we can watch these videos anywhere and at any timeanywhere of anytime even without spending money.
On the other hand, if fewer people choosethere is less people choose to go outside to watch the shows or movies. The theatres and cinemas get less income to cover their operating costsafford the fees of places. Because of this reason, the tax paid to the governmenttax that give to government will decrease. It also influences the economic circle around local residents. What's more, when people sit in the cinema, they can enjoy the time watching movieson watch movies, it is easy to become emotionally engagedit is easily to go into the emotions and feel the real meaning behind the movies. Meanwhile, the shows in the theatres show different cultures that can broaden our horizonsborden our horizen and unwindrelax ourselves.
In my opinion, government can encourageencourge people to the theatres and cinemas by subsidising venues, so that residents spend less money to watch films and shows.by giving money to the entertainment places, which residents will spend less money to watch the movies and shows. Not only can lower the financial burdeneconomic stress, but also be conduciveconductive to different ages of people to learn different cultures.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response successfully addresses both sides of the prompt and provides a clear concluding opinion, which is its main strength. However, the essay is limited by frequent grammatical errors, faulty sentence structures, and imprecise vocabulary choices that obscure meaning in places. To achieve a higher result, focus on improving grammatical accuracy, refining academic vocabulary usage, and expanding on main ideas with more structured explanations.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay addresses both viewpoints and presents a personal stance in the conclusion, though some arguments remain underdeveloped.
Elaborate more fully on each main point with concrete examples and ensure your conclusion directly answers the main prompt question.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing is used to separate main points, but linking expressions and sentence transitions are often mechanical or misused.
Practice using logical transition signals accurately to ensure smooth sentence-to-sentence progression throughout body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
A basic range of vocabulary is attempted, but frequent word choice mistakes, spelling errors, and misuse of complex words impede clarity.
Focus on using familiar academic vocabulary correctly rather than attempting complex words that may lead to spelling or usage mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent grammatical and structural errors occur throughout the essay, including incomplete sentences and incorrect prepositions.
Review fundamental sentence patterns, conditional structures, and clause connections to build greater accuracy in complex sentences.