The following pie charts show the results of a survey into the most popular leisure activities in the United States of America in 1999 and 2009.
Sample Response
The pie chartsThe graphs showreveal information about the most popularcommon leisure activities which Americansthe American engaged in 1999 and 2009between 1999 and 2009. Overall, the largest percentage of people living in the US enjoyed walking.
The charts show thatAs can be seen clearly, the sharesfigures for soccer, camping and walking increased by one or two percentage pointsincreased slightly by 1%-2% to 18%, 9% and 31% respectively between the two survey yearsduring the ten-year period. On the other hand, there was a nearly doubling in the proportions of people joining in yoga (5 to 10 % ) and swimming ( 9 to 18% ) __ over the same period.
By contrast, the charts showthe period shown witnessed a significant decrease in the percentages of Americanspercentages of American people participating in the activities that declinedparticipating in the remaining activities. To be more specific, the figure for jogging fell by more than half, from 7% to 3%nearly halved from 7% to 3%. What is more, there was a dramatic fall in the proportion of people doing aerobicsaerobics players from 13% to 4% from 1999 to 2009. Finally, when it comes to bicycling, the figure for this activity dropped from 1214% to 7%.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response is strongest in its clear organization and broad coverage of the activities, with most movements and figures accurately reported. Its main limitation is the incomplete overview and two content errors: bicycling is misreported as starting at 14%, and the second chart labels the 10% category as weightlifting rather than yoga. Prioritize a fuller overview that summarizes the main rises and falls while checking every category label and value.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The report covers nearly all activities and identifies walking as the largest category, but its overview is limited and two visual details are inaccurate.
Summarize the overall pattern of increases and decreases, and verify bicycling and the changed final category against the charts.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from increases to decreases, with clear paragraphing and generally effective linking.
Reduce formulaic transitions and make the contrast between the two groups of activities more direct.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a useful range of change vocabulary, although several activity-related expressions are awkward or imprecise.
Use natural combinations such as people participating in aerobics and the proportion choosing an activity.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the comparisons clearly despite several article, noun-form, and punctuation errors.
Check articles, plural reference, and comparative structures, especially phrases such as nearly doubled and Americans engaged in activities.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The following pie charts show the results of a survey into the most popular leisure activities in the United States of America in 1999 and 2009.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.