The following diagram shows how greenhouse gases trap energy from the Sun.
Sample Response
The diagram explains the effect of greenhouse gases trapped by sun rays, doing more harm than good.
Overall, the energy originates from the Sunorigin of energy is from the Sun, which supplies heat to the Earthwhere the greenhouse receives its heat. The heat is not fully absorbed byabsorbed fully on the Earth’searth’s surface, while some is reflected by the atmospherebut half of it doesn’t even pass through the atmosphere barrier. Likewise, some of the energy is reflected back into spaceto the space after reaching the planetplane. Some of the co2 which are not generated from greenhouse but are from factories, automobiles which, when combined together, are harming the flora on the planet.
First of all, Sun provides a greenhouse with heat energy former later used by the plants to germinate and produce flowers and fruits, which in return produce carbon dioxide. By contrastIn comparison, without greenhouse gaseswhen we don’t use a greenhouse, there wouldwill be no trappedconfined heat, and all the heat that reachedall the heat which came the Earth’s surfaceon earth’s surface would have radiated back into space.
Secondly, vehicles and factoriescovered man-made machines are also emitting carbon dioxidegiving rise to pollution, which increases its concentration in the atmospherewhich eventually harms the greenery around us and pollutes the atmosphere even further.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies sunlight, reflected energy, carbon dioxide from vehicles and factories, and some trapped heat, giving it a partial connection to the diagram. Its main explanation is nevertheless seriously distorted by treating the subject as a physical greenhouse, inventing proportions, and misrepresenting plants and emissions. The priority is to explain the actual causal cycle accurately, including fossil-fuel emissions and reduced carbon-dioxide absorption after tree felling.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Only some visual elements are recognised, while major features are omitted or seriously misinterpreted and several unsupported claims are introduced.
Describe solar energy, reflected and radiated heat, greenhouse-gas trapping, fossil-fuel emissions, and tree loss exactly as shown.
Coherence and Cohesion
Basic paragraphing and sequencing are present, but the progression is weakened by disconnected claims and an unclear comparison with using a greenhouse.
Organise the report around the diagram's linked causes and effects rather than adding a separate hypothetical comparison.
Lexical Resource
There is some relevant environmental vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate or awkward choices obscure the intended process.
Use precise terms such as atmosphere, fossil fuels, carbon-dioxide absorption, heat radiation, and greenhouse gases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The writer attempts complex sentences, but frequent agreement, article, reference, and sentence-structure problems disrupt clarity.
Build shorter complete clauses and check subject-verb agreement and pronoun reference before combining ideas.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The following diagram shows how greenhouse gases trap energy from the Sun.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.