The diagram shows the small-scale production of smoked fish.
Sample Response
The process chart illustrates the making of smoked fish on a small scale. Overall, it is immediately apparent from the chart that there are a total of seven steps for completing the process of producing smoked fishprocedure of smoky fish, beginning with killingassassinating the fish and culminating in packaging and delivery.
In detail, in thethis first step the fish are killedfish got killed with a sharp knife before moving to the next stageand move forward into further steps. Next, the fish are rinseddead fish rinse in salt waterwith salt and water for 30 minutes. After the washing stage, the fish are heated over a flamefish was put on flame and cooked for five minutes. Following this, in the fourth stage, the fish are arranged in a rowall the fish are arranged in series on a plate before being moved to the next stageand ready to move to another stage.
Furthermore, the fish is put into a vatthe vast and positioned above the coalsplaced upon coals which produce smoke when they burnwhen it burns up, and woodweed is placed over the vaton the container. The process runs for about 30 minutes and then moves ahead into the second last in this stage; the yellow colour gets sprinkled with a gun and passed in the final step. Moreover, the smoked fishready-smoked fish arewere packed in a container and transported to the market.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response gives a clear start-to-finish account and covers nearly every stage, with an explicit overview and generally logical sequencing. Its effectiveness is reduced by inaccurate labels such as ‘assassinating,’ ‘weed,’ and ‘vast,’ alongside persistent grammar errors that make several steps awkward to interpret. The priority is to describe each action with precise process vocabulary and consistent passive forms, especially the smoking and colouring stages.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response provides an overview and reports the full sequence, but some process details are inaccurately named or described.
Verify each visual stage carefully and state that the fish are smoked over wood in a vat before yellow colouring is applied.
Coherence and Cohesion
The stages progress in a broadly logical order across clear paragraphs, although some linking is mechanical and one later sentence is overloaded.
Use one sentence for each major stage and rely on simple chronological links instead of joining several actions in one sentence.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to describe the process, but frequent inappropriate choices such as ‘assassinating,’ ‘smoky fish,’ ‘vast,’ and ‘weed’ reduce precision.
Use accurate process terms such as ‘kill,’ ‘smoked fish,’ ‘vat,’ ‘wood,’ ‘apply colouring,’ and ‘package.’
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts passive and complex structures, but frequent errors in tense, agreement, articles, and clause formation weaken control.
Describe the process consistently in the present simple passive, for example ‘the fish are rinsed’ and ‘the fish are smoked.’
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The diagram shows the small-scale production of smoked fish.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.