The first graph gives the number of passengers travelling by train in Sydney. The second graph provides information on the percentage of trains running on time.
Sample Response
The line graphs give data on the number of train commuters in Sydney from 1995 to 2004 and outline the percentageratio of trains that ran on time during the same period. As an overall trend, the number of rail passengers in Sydney gradually increased between 1995 to 2002 and in 2004 a higher percentage of locomotives failed to run on time. As the data suggests, 250 million passengers used the train servicestransportations in Sydney in 1995in 1995 in Sydney and this number slowly increased over the next four yearsin the next 4 years. In 1999, number of train commuterstrain commuters' number in Sydney was around 265 million and it rose sharplyabruptly hiked overin the next two years before dropping again in 2002. In 2000, 280 million passengers travelled by trainused locomotives and this number further increased and reached a peak of 300 millionreached to the highest, 300 million, in 2001. From 2002 to 2004 the train commuters’ number remained constant at 280 million. Turning to punctualityBesides, more than 92% of trains92% trains in 1995 arrivedarrived and reached their destination on time but this figure fellthis record deteriorated and dropped to just over 85% in 1997. In 2000, almost 15% of trains15% rails failed to run on timemaintain the schedule and the figure was highestthis scenario was worst in 2004 when more than 25% of trains25% trains in Sydney could not run on time.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response selects several important figures and clearly identifies the passenger peak and the sharp decline in punctuality at the end. Its main limitation is that the overview misstates the passenger trend and the discussion of punctuality omits substantial fluctuations between the selected years. Prioritise a fully accurate overview and compare the major peaks, troughs, and reversals across both graphs before adding supporting figures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response covers both graphs and reports several key values, but the overview inaccurately extends the passenger rise to 2002 and important punctuality fluctuations are omitted.
State the 2001 passenger peak and the fluctuating punctuality pattern accurately, then support both trends with well-selected comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses from passengers to punctuality in a generally logical sequence, although the single dense paragraph and some linking choices weaken organisation.
Use a clear overview paragraph followed by one paragraph for each graph, with links that express comparison and change precisely.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonable range for trends and quantities, but several choices such as train transportations, abruptly hiked, and rails are unnatural or imprecise.
Prefer precise graph-reporting language such as passenger numbers rose sharply, trains, and punctuality rate, while avoiding unnecessary synonyms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the data clearly, but recurring article, preposition, plural, and comparative-form errors reduce control.
Check structures around figures and trends, especially between 1995 and 2002, reached a peak, and more than 92% of trains.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The first graph gives the number of passengers travelling by train in Sydney. The second graph provides information on the percentage of trains running on time.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.