Research has shown that overeating is as harmful as smoking. Therefore, the advertising of certain food products should be banned in the way as the advertising of cigarettes is banned. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Evidently, due to disastrous effects on health, some researchers argue that the advertising of certain food productspublication of some specific eatables should be bannedput under the ban. I, however, firmly disagree with this proposalideology. Upcoming segments are going to elaborate my viewpoint and with material facts and examples.
To beginembark with, overeating is considerably as harmful as smokingdeleterious same as smoking, although I believe adverts are not primarily culpable. Fast food is gaining popularity worldwide since it is affordable, delicious and easy to cook. Hence, people are unable to resist eatingirresistible to intake readily available foods on the street. Furthermore, what makes today’s generaffordablsb, their own eating habits and surely they are more reliant on fast foods than homemade ones. Moreover, everyone has the fundamental right to choose what they want to eat; as such, their own choice is forcing them to eat unhealthy foodstuff.
MoreoverOn the contrary, without any doubt, advertisingadvertisement influences people's attitudesthe mentality as well as the eating habits of viewers; this does not mean that it provokes themalert doesn’t mean it provokes them to adopt an unhealthy diet. Rather, itRather it makes people aware and provides useful information regarding a balanced diet. For example, via ads, one can check the levelsensure the level of energy, fat, calories and vitamins present in food items, and then they can decide whether it is good for their healthit is worthy to their precious health or not. In addition to this, besidesdespite TV advertisements, public campaigns can make illiterate consumers aware of overeatingoverheating issues.
To conclude, I believe the government must not impose restrictions on food advertisingadvertisement programmes since, despite attracting, it also makes today’s consumers more rational. Ministries should initiate seminars or special programmes that could spread awareness among the publicfolks to flatten the curve of this menace.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response maintains a clear disagreement and offers two broadly relevant reasons, especially the emphasis on personal choice and consumer information. Its main limitation is that several ideas are only loosely explained, while frequent awkward or incorrect expressions sometimes disrupt the argument. The highest priority is to state each reason in precise, grammatical sentences and develop it with a direct explanation of why banning advertisements would be ineffective.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and supported by relevant reasons, though parts of the argument remain insufficiently explained or convincing.
Develop each reason through a clear cause-and-effect explanation that directly shows why an advertising ban is unnecessary.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has a recognizable four-paragraph progression, but some linking is mechanical or inaccurate and one sentence seriously interrupts coherence.
Use simpler, accurate transitions and ensure every sentence connects clearly to the paragraph's central idea.
Lexical Resource
There is a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, but frequent inappropriate word choices and collocations reduce precision and naturalness.
Prefer familiar, precise terms such as advertising, food products, and consumers, and check collocations before using ambitious vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied complex structures, but recurring errors in sentence construction, agreement, and phrasing sometimes obscure meaning.
Build complex sentences from clearly controlled clauses and proofread each one for a complete, grammatically connected structure.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Research has shown that overeating is as harmful as smoking. Therefore, the advertising of certain food products should be banned in the way as the advertising of cigarettes is banned. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.