Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects at university in many countries. Why is this? What effects does this have on society?
Sample Response
It has become increasingly less common in recent years for individuals to major in STEM-related subjects. In my opinion, this is the result of the growth of more business-oriented fields of study, althoughstudy though the actual effects on society are marginal.
More young peopleGreater numbers of young people now opt to major in subjects related to economics and finance rather than science. Over the past century, economies worldwideglobally have grown and can now support white-collar professions such as those in marketing, banking, investment, and finance. These occupations allow an individual to earn a high salaryengage directly in earning a high salary without requiring the hard work or talent that is needed for demanding scientific careersintensive scientific jobs. It is therefore only natural that individuals will increasingly gravitate towards work that guarantees them the greatest possible rewards with the least possible effort.
However, this shift to more lucrative fields only moderately impacts the field of science. The reason for that is that there is still substantial demand for innovation in scientific fields being driven by both private and public interests. A strong example of this situation would be the worldwide response to the COVIDCovid-19 pandemic and the rapid development of viable vaccines. The main areas where science is affected by interest in other majors areareas where science is hurt by interest in other majors is in less prominent rolesat the fringes where the average worker is more likely to pursue a job at a bank or marketing firm rather than an engineering or manufacturing company. Although this has led to a decline in passion for scientific endeavours among certain segments of the populationdecrease among certain segments of the population in their passion for scientific endeavors, there is still valuablegreat work being done by professionals in a variety of fields.
In conclusion, it is a logical consequence of more developed economies that many students are now less likely to major in the sciences. However, the impact on society is largely imperceptible and offset in various wayscompensated for in various ways.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is fluent, well organised, and supported by a pertinent pandemic example, with particularly strong vocabulary and sentence control. Its main limitation is task development: it offers essentially one reason for students' choices and treats the societal effects indirectly, so the claim that consequences are marginal is not fully demonstrated. The priority is to explain a broader range of causes and show concrete consequences for society, even if arguing that they are limited.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions receive a clear answer, but the range of causes is narrow and the societal effects remain somewhat indirect.
Develop at least one additional cause and explain specific consequences for services, innovation, or the skilled workforce.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are sequenced logically in focused paragraphs, and cohesion is smooth and unobtrusive throughout.
Make the internal progression of the effects paragraph even sharper by moving from the general claim to distinct societal consequences.
Lexical Resource
A wide and precise vocabulary is used naturally, with only occasional slightly awkward phrasing.
Refine isolated expressions such as the description of science being hurt at the fringes to maximise precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide variety of complex structures is handled accurately, and the great majority of sentences are error-free.
Check the few long sentences for subject-verb agreement and streamline clause structure where it becomes dense.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects at university in many countries. Why is this? What effects does this have on society?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.