In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Sample Response
Nowadays, many people prefer hiring personal fitness trainers instead of joining group exercise classes or sports teams. While personal trainers offer customized workout plans tailored to individual needs and goals, this trend raises concerns about affordability and lack of community.
To begin with, the main benefit of personal trainers is that they provide one-on-one attention and workout routines tailoredpersonalized workout routines designed specifically for each client. This personalized approach can lead to better results that align withbetter results aligned with the individual’s fitness objectives. Personal trainers also offerprovide motivation and accountability, which can help people stay committed to their fitness routinejourney. However, a significant drawbacka major downside is that personal training services are often expensive, making them unaffordable for many people. This creates inequality in accessThis creates inequalities, as only those with sufficient financial means can access suchthese personalized fitness services. FurthermoreFurther, the rise of personal training may contribute to the decline of group fitness activities such as exercise classesactivities like exercise classes and sports teams. These group activities foster a sense of community, social interaction, and shared experiences, which are valuable for overall well-being.
To address these concerns, efforts should be made to promote both personal training and group fitness activities. Group classes and sports should be encouraged as they create a sense of community while still supporting individual fitness goals. At the same time, exploring ways to make personal training more affordable or subsidized could help reduce disparities in access.
In conclusion, while personal fitness trainers offer benefits like customized plans, the trend raises valid concerns about affordability and lack of community engagement. A balanced approach that supportscelebrates both personalized and group-based fitness activities can create an inclusive environment that supports the well-being of people from all backgrounds. (271 words)
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response is fluent, well organized, and supported by relevant discussion of personalized guidance, affordability, and the social value of group exercise. Its main limitation is that the reasons for the trend and the overall positive-or-negative judgement are not separated or stated as directly as they could be. Prioritize a sharper thesis and topic structure that explicitly answers each question before developing the supporting details.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are addressed through relevant benefits and concerns, though the reasons and final evaluation could be stated more explicitly and distinctly.
Give a direct overall judgement in the thesis and organize the main reasons for hiring trainers separately from the evaluation of the trend.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through clear paragraphs and cohesive links, with only some imbalance caused by concentrating several functions in the long second paragraph.
Give the reasons and the evaluation their own focused body paragraphs so that each stage of the argument is immediately clear.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise, with effective language for fitness, access, motivation, and community despite some repetition of key terms.
Reduce repetition of words such as personal, personalized, and group by using precise paraphrases where they remain natural.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence forms is used accurately and flexibly, with errors rare and meaning consistently clear.
Refine occasional awkward coordination, especially when linking alternatives such as making services affordable or subsidized.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.