The proliferation of private cars on the roads in many parts of the world has led to serious problems of pollution and may contribute to global warming. Some people think that governments should spend money for development of public transportation systems in order to help alleviate this problem. Others think it is better to spend money for the development of electric and other types of cars that may cause less pollution. Do you think it is better for a government to spend money developing public transportation or developing new kinds of cars? Why or why not?
Sample Response
At present, Earth faces the serious problem thatIn the present time, the earth is facing the worst fact that the increased numberincreased number of personal vehicles on the highways is causing greater air pollutionis resulting in increasing air pollution which is the majorpremium contributing factor of global warming. It has sparked a heated debate betweenin between the peoplefolks who assume that this devastating situation could be handled if the state allocates funding tomakes a budget for improving our local traffic systems and the people who believe that the creation of advanced vehicles that run on electricityvehicles those are advance and run by electricity could solve the problem easily. However, I believe that both approaches areAlthough, I believe that, both the ways are good enough to manage the condition effectively.
To start with, global warming is a worldwide concern for modern generations. To deal with this, many countries are imposing some effective rules and legislationlegislations for transport systemson the traffic systems. Similarly, many highway codes have recently been changedare being changed recently to minimise the level of pollutionseverity of pollutions. It should have been done earlier, butThough it should be done earlier but it is “better late than never”. For example, in the UK, highway codes are enforcedmaintaining very strictly, so greenhouse gas emissions are reduced considerablythus emissions of greenhouse gases are reduced remarkably.
Further, nowadays newly developed types of car area newly invented type of cars are appearingbeing noticed on the roads of developed countries. These are the hybrid cars, which are powered by a combination of electricity and compressed gasthose are made by electricity and compressed gas combinedly. For instance, these hybrid cars are much more effective at reducing pollutionfor reducing pollutions as they are using electricity rather than carbon dioxide emitting fuels such as petrol and diesel. Furthermore, in many developing countries, CNG based vehicles are introduced those are environment-friendly.
To summarise, in my opinion, we must foot the bill of this devastating outcome of global warming, if we are not being aware and the good news is governments are now making some positive approaches to save the environment followed by saving our world.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response shows an attempt to organise the discussion and uses some relevant environmental vocabulary, particularly when describing lower-emission vehicles. However, it does not clearly choose and justify one of the two spending priorities, and its discussion of public transport is replaced largely by comments about highway rules. The highest-priority improvement is to make a direct comparative judgement and develop both funding options with relevant reasons before defending the preferred one.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response touches on pollution reduction but does not directly resolve the required choice, while public-transport investment is barely developed.
State which spending option is better and compare the effectiveness of public transport with cleaner-car development using specific reasons.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and basic signposting provide a visible structure, but progression is weakened by off-focus material and a conclusion that does not resolve the argument.
Give each body paragraph one spending option and use the conclusion to state the comparative judgement clearly.
Lexical Resource
There is some range in environmental vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices make several claims awkward or imprecise.
Prioritise accurate common expressions such as allocate funding, enforce regulations, and reduce emissions over forced or unnatural phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex forms are attempted, but frequent errors in articles, agreement, relative clauses, verb forms, and punctuation sometimes strain meaning.
Use shorter controlled complex sentences and check every clause for a clear subject, correct verb form, and accurate connector.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The proliferation of private cars on the roads in many parts of the world has led to serious problems of pollution and may contribute to global warming. Some people think that governments should spend money for development of public transportation systems in order to help alleviate this problem. Others think it is better to spend money for the development of electric and other types of cars that may cause less pollution. Do you think it is better for a government to spend money developing public transportation or developing new kinds of cars? Why or why not?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.