These days, many young people are not spending their weekends and holidays doing outdoor activities such as hiking or mountaineering. Why is that happening? How can they be encouraged to spend more time in the natural environment?
Sample Response
Nowadays, the younger generation tends to avoid recreational activities such as hiking or mountaineeringalpinism. It seems that young people prefer to spend their weekends indoors, gaming or engaging in other online activities. If that is the case, by promoting sports more actively and organising sports competitions, schoolsthe schools could counteract this trend.
In today's technological eraLiving in the era of technology, the wide availability and variety of online entertainment are compelling young people to spend a lot of their free time indoors, using their gadgets. Numerous relatively cheap forms of amusement, such as online games, videos, audiobooks and plenty of other activities, tempt teenagers to stay at home and lead more sedentary lifestyles. A recent survey revealed that the vast majority of students would prefer spending their weekends playing computer games, rather than in the nature. That is one clear reason why young people todayour modern youth is less interested in recreational sports.
To address this issue, school administratorsthe school management could intervene and offer a widerbetter range of outdoor sports activities and competitions, both within the school curriculum and as extracurricularextra-curricular activities. For example, high schools could increase the number of weekly football, running and climbing classes, and organise competitions at the end of each term. As a result, motivatedpushed by their desire to win, students would do more walking, jogging, running and mountaineering during the school term, in preparation for these competitionsin preparation for the competition. This would reduce the time spent online, lessen the students’ dependence on the Internet for entertainment, and eventually boost their desire to spend more time enjoying the natural environment.
To sum up, screen addiction plays a major role in young people’s avoidance of various outdoor activities. Providing more recreational sportsOpening up more recreational sports and offering frequent competitions on school grounds is a great way to motivate more students to spend their leisure time in naturetheir leisure time in the nature.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response is strongest in its clear, sustained explanation of how online entertainment discourages outdoor activity and how school competitions could motivate participation. Its main limitation is a narrow treatment of both causes and solutions, since almost the entire argument rests on screen use and school-based sport. The highest-priority improvement is to add and develop a distinct second cause or intervention while maintaining the same logical clarity.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both questions are answered directly, with one cause and one solution developed through relevant explanation and examples.
Broaden the response by developing an additional distinct cause or practical means of encouraging contact with nature.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress logically through a clear introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion, with cohesive devices used effectively.
Use fewer explicit signposts where the logical relationship between sentences is already clear.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a wide and generally precise range of vocabulary for technology, recreation, and motivation, despite a few awkward choices.
Refine collocations and article use in phrases such as 'in nature' and choose more natural terms where possible.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is handled accurately, and the few grammatical slips do not impede communication.
Polish article and preposition choices in otherwise well-controlled complex sentences.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
These days, many young people are not spending their weekends and holidays doing outdoor activities such as hiking or mountaineering. Why is that happening? How can they be encouraged to spend more time in the natural environment?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.