The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants.

Sample Response

1

The bar graph presents the numbers of males and females at an adult education center who attended different evening classes in 2009. The pie graph displays data on the participantsstudents’ ages. Overall, women outnumbered men in three of the four classesfemales were seemingly more interested in the classes than men. By age, older people made up a larger share of participants than younger peopleAge-wise, night classes appealed more to older people than younger people. As seen in the bar graph, more females attended the classes than males. The most popular course among women was languagemost popular class for women was in languages (40), which saw twice as many women attending as men. Painting courses were also popular, with a narrower gender gapwith more equal attendance, though women still outnumbered men, at 30 and 25 respectively. Drama again witnessed double the attendance for women over men. The only course with more men was sculpture, for which 10 men signed up versus only 5 women. Regarding age, the course participants were predominantly from the seniors, those 50 years old and above, and people in their forties with 42% and 26%, respectively. Next came the people aged 30–39thirty-year-olds (16%) and people aged 20–29twenty-year-olds (11%). Very few students attending the evening classes were under 20 years of age.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 8.0

The response selects the most important features from both charts and supports its overview with accurate, well-integrated figures. Its main limitation is occasional interpretive or imprecise wording, such as describing attendance as interest and broad age bands as particular ages. The highest-priority improvement is to keep every description strictly aligned with what the categories and measurements actually show.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TA

Task Achievement

8.5
Scoring rule

Both visuals are covered fully through a clear overview, accurate figures, and relevant comparisons.

Next step

Describe attendance and age bands literally so that no unsupported interpretation enters an otherwise precise report.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

7.5
Scoring rule

Information is sequenced clearly from the overview to course attendance and then participant ages.

Next step

Separate the overview and the two detail groups into distinct paragraphs for sharper organisation.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.5
Scoring rule

The report uses a strong range of comparison and data-reporting vocabulary with only occasional imprecision.

Next step

Use exact category labels and avoid wording that infers preferences from attendance figures.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

8.0
Scoring rule

Complex and simple structures are varied and controlled, with only minor awkwardness in a few phrases.

Next step

Polish compressed comparison phrases and appositive structures to achieve consistently natural expression.

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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants.

Your response

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