In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
Sample Response
The period of childhood is the most critical stage in the lives of children. Some people think that children must be monitored and under surveillancesurveillances during their childhood. Others have no such strict rules forupon children. However, for several reasonsfor many reasons which will be mentioned below, I strongly believe that children must be guidedcontrolled by their families.
The first reason why children have to be closely supervisedput under notice is that they cannot distinguish between what is right and what is wrong. To illustrate, every family is solely responsible for its children’schildren behaviour. In other words, their parents must know how and what kind of behaviourwhat kind behaviour their children are heading to. Such knowledge will immensely help the family to guidemaintain their children and provide them with good conducta good conduct. Consequently, such children will be of a responsible and respectful behaviournoble and great behaviour.
The second reason why children must undergo strict rules of behaviour is that they are the the adults of the futurepioneers of future. In other words, children should be taught and instructed with positive patterns of behavioura good pattern of behaviour which appeals to all those around them. Additionally, the family is the first who can implement such an approachimplement such way in order to be able to cope with their lives properly. Hence, having obtained and acquired such good behaviour, children are expected to be the future-makers who will excel in their lives.
To recap, it is undeniableit is without denial that children should be subjected to strict rules of behaviour. This will direct them to the right path and will tremendously contribute toin shaping their future. So, every family is advised to do the above in order to raise responsible and promising childrenproduce a promising and noble child whose contribution in society will be of great importance.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response’s strongest feature is its clear, consistent position, presented through an easy-to-follow introduction, two supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion. Its main limitation is that the discussion remains one-sided and repeatedly asserts that strict rules produce good behaviour without defining appropriate limits or developing concrete consequences. Prioritise a nuanced answer that distinguishes necessary boundaries from increasing independence as children mature, supported by specific examples and expressed in direct, accurate language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay gives a clear opinion that children should follow strict rules and provides two supporting reasons. However, it treats the issue one-sidedly and does not discuss the extent or possible limits of strictness in enough depth.
Answer "to what extent" by defining a balanced position, such as firm rules for safety and respect but more freedom as children mature.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure is easy to follow, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Cohesion is clear but repetitive, and several paragraphs rely on broad restatement rather than progressive development.
Use topic sentences that introduce distinct ideas, then add examples and consequences instead of repeating that rules create good behaviour.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate for the topic but often formal in an unnatural way. Phrases such as "under surveillances", "put under notice" and "pioneers of future" reduce precision.
Use direct child-development vocabulary: "supervised", "boundaries", "guidance", "responsibility", "self-control" and "independence".
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The essay uses some complex structures, but errors with articles, prepositions, plurals and clause patterns are frequent. Meaning remains mostly clear, but accuracy limits the score.
Check noun phrases carefully, especially article use and singular/plural forms after general nouns like children, behaviour, families and rules.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.