We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in businesses, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used for in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we he more auspicious of their benefits?
Sample Response
Computers are a relatively new invention. The first computers were built fifty years ago and it is only in the last thirty or so years that their influence has affected our everyday life. Personal computers were introduced as recently as the early eighties. In this short time they have made a tremendous impact on our lives. We are now so dependent on computers that it is hard to imagine what things would be like today without them. One need onlyYou have only got to go into a bank when their main computer is broken to appreciate the chaos that would occur if computers were suddenly removed worldwideremoved world-wide.
In the future computers will be used to create more powerful and sophisticated computersbigger and even more sophisticated computers. The prospect of such complexityThe prospects for this are quite alarming. They will be so complex that no individual could hope to understand how they work. They will bring a lot of benefits but they will also increase the risk of unimaginable chaosincrease the potential for unimaginable chaos. They will, for example, be able to fly planes and they will be able to co ordinate the movements of several planes in the vicinity of an airport. Provided that all the computers are working correctlyProviding all the computers are working correctly nothing can go wrong. If one small program fails disaster.
There is a certain inevitability that technology will progress and become increasingly complex. We should, however, ensure that we are still in a position where we are able to control technology. It will be all too easy to suddenly discover that technology is controlling us. By then it might be too late. I believeBy then it might be too late I believe that it is very important to assess the benefits criticallybe suspicious of the benefits that computers will bring and to make sure that we never become totally dependent on a fully technology-dependent worlda completely technological world.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response takes a clear, cautionary position and is organized around a logical progression from present dependence to future risks. Its main limitation is that the prediction of future computer uses is narrow and partly repeats the prompt, while several ideas end abruptly or remain underdeveloped. The highest priority is to add distinct, well-explained future applications and support each with a concrete consequence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response answers both questions and maintains a clear position, but its treatment of future uses is narrow and unevenly developed.
Develop two or three distinct future applications with specific explanations of their benefits or risks.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall paragraph sequence is logical, although abrupt statements and compressed links sometimes weaken the flow within ideas.
Build each point through complete cause-and-effect steps and use clearer links between supporting sentences.
Lexical Resource
A sufficiently wide vocabulary conveys nuanced concerns effectively, with only occasional awkward wording and spelling or formation lapses.
Refine collocations and word forms so sophisticated vocabulary remains consistently natural and precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex structures is generally controlled, but sentence fragments and missing punctuation cause noticeable local disruption.
Proofread sentence boundaries carefully, especially conditional clauses and transitions between complete ideas.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in businesses, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used for in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we he more auspicious of their benefits?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.