Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of giving international aids to poor countries.
Sample Response
There are many poor countries in this world and they are mostly located in the African and Asian regions, such as Liberia, Zimbabwe, Bangladesh, Myanmar and Sudan. It is a fact that mostIt is a fact most of these countries depend onare depending on the supportsupports of the developed countries. These international aidaids have their own benefits and drawbacks, and the following essay will discuss them in detaildetails.
To begin with, giving supportsupports to third world countries brings advantagesbring some advantages for both donorthe giver and the recipient countries. It gives benefits for countries that could give international aids, as they have the opportunity to showopportunity show their kindness to other countries. Showing these positive attitudes could change the world into a better place and promote world peaceimprove the world peace. As for the recipient countries, the help would positively affect the socioeconomic conditionssocial economic conditions of their people. For instance, these financial supports could be used to purchase foodsome foods for the starving residents.
On the other hand, despite the positive things of international supports, there are some negative things that arose as well. Firstly, these supports have made the people in recipient countriesrecipient countries people become dependent and less self-reliantlazy and spoil. As they realise that they will be supported from developed and developing countries, they do not want to have changes and improvements in their lives. Secondly, many of the support funds are not strictly and properly monitored. As a result, most of the funds are being misappropriatedcorrupted by local authorities.
In conclusion, providing international aids to third world countries has its own advantages and disadvantages. In my opinion, as a social creature, people should help each other, though we might come from different races, ethnics or languages. Therefore, it is essential for advanced countries to help poor nations, but the support should be strictly monitored to ensure that the funds are allocated properly.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay covers benefits and drawbacks of international aid and ends with a clear, relevant view that aid should continue under strict monitoring. The structure is easy to follow, but several claims are simplistic or insufficiently supported, particularly the suggestion that recipients become lazy. Develop causes and safeguards more carefully, avoid stereotyping, and correct frequent word-form, agreement, and countability errors.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both sides are addressed and a clear position is given, but advantages are thinly developed and the dependency claim is overgeneralised.
Use specific mechanisms such as emergency relief and infrastructure, then explain dependency risks without stereotyping individuals.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph progression is clear, though some ideas are linked by formulaic sequencing and weak referencing.
Use topic sentences that name the precise benefit or risk and connect examples directly to them.
Lexical Resource
Relevant topic vocabulary is present, but support, aid, food, peace, and socioeconomic are often used inaccurately.
Treat aid as uncountable and use precise terms such as donor, recipient, corruption, and accountability.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent agreement, article, infinitive, and word-form errors reduce accuracy, though meaning is generally clear.
Check singular uncountable nouns and ensure every verb agrees with its subject.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of giving international aids to poor countries.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.