Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Recently, there is an ongoing debate about the significant impacts on the economy by thriving tourism industry create further severe problems in local cultures and environment. This essay, as my notion leads to, tries to elaborate this issue as I believe that problems created are inevitable.
Firstly, touriststhe tourists, whether they are foreigners or domestic touristslocal ones, tend to disrespect the cultural norms of tourist destinationsdisobey the cultural background of the tourism places. Even though they are familiar withare well known about the local customssurroundings habit, they consider themselvesconsider themselves as guests who are supposed to be served by the local communitysociety paying no attentionattentions to the local valuesnative motives.
Secondly, they care less about the environment such as evergreens, rivers, beaches, etc. because they are aware of the government, which has an obligationgovernment’s existence who has an obligation to maintain environmental qualitymaintain a quality environment. To be exact, they just throw rubbish inthrow the garbage away into inappropriate places. The local people areget influenced by the way tourists dress and talk and they also adopt foreign cultural practices that threaten local traditionsother foreign cultures that are threatening to the local culture. It is often observed that people in tourist areasarea send their children to workengage their children in work instead of sending them to school and that has a huge impact on the overall country's economic growth and futuregrowth of the economy and future of a country, especially a developing countrya third world country.
Lastly, they together with stakeholders who are taking an interest, in this case, argue that this industry can lift the nation from economy problem through opening job opportunities or increasing the income of local citizens as well as the government revenue at the same time, but it seems to be irrelevant. The experts revealed that tourism may cause more expenditure in preserving the unique local cultures and also more expenses in taking care of the environment surrounding tourism places, and it costs more than how much a nation can afford from the industry.
Having considered all views above, it is fact that tourism sector has positive effects on the economy but the negative impacts are much higher to overcome by money gotten from this particular sector. Hopefully, governments and councils can regulate the industry by taking more concern in all aspects (economy, culture, and environment) to result in the maximum outcome.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response takes a recognizable position and covers both cultural and environmental damage in a clear paragraph structure. Its main limitation is that frequent grammatical and word-choice problems obscure parts of the reasoning, while several claims are only loosely explained. The highest-priority improvement is to build each body paragraph around one precise claim, explain the causal link, and support it with a clear relevant example in simpler, controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses the question with a consistent view that tourism's harms outweigh its benefits, but several supporting ideas are insufficiently developed or only partly relevant.
Choose the strongest cultural and environmental harms and explain each with a specific example showing how tourism directly causes the damage.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a recognizable progression and clear paragraph divisions, although mechanical sequencing and unclear pronoun references weaken local connections.
Replace firstly, secondly, and lastly with explicit topic sentences, and ensure every pronoun has an unmistakable referent.
Lexical Resource
There is enough vocabulary to discuss tourism, culture, and the environment, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices reduce clarity.
Use simpler established combinations such as respect local customs, create jobs, and protect the environment, then check each phrase for natural usage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied complex structures, but frequent errors with articles, agreement, plurals, and clause construction sometimes make meaning difficult to follow.
Write shorter sentence units and proofread each one for a complete clause, correct subject-verb agreement, and necessary articles before combining ideas.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.